


Behind Closed Closets

by sampsonknight



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2003), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types, teen - Fandom
Genre: Abuse, Bondage, Gay, Gen, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Sex, Stalking, Unhealthy Relationships, Viagra, Violence, altered physical State
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2020-01-23 04:44:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 41,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18542530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sampsonknight/pseuds/sampsonknight
Summary: Sometimes love isn't simple as we wish it to be, is the person you love the one you believe you want to be with or is it the one that you can't stop thinking about? Casey is torn by this, unsure what he wants nor is he sure what he is really thinking and feeling. What is wrong with him? He can't really be into Raph... could he?Disclaimer: The TMNT isn’t mine and this is just a fan fiction writing. No money is being made on this story.Warning: Rape/Non-Con, Sex description/elements, Violence, Gay and so on.Please don't read if you don't like these genres. Thanks.





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

 

The greenery surrounded the two friends as each narrow their blazing eyes at each other.  
  
Casey cracked his knuckles, then licked his top lip, as his opponent Raph did the same yet then flatten out his palm gesturing Casey to bring it.  
  
“The loser will have to clean April’s shop top to bottom, no skimping out,” Casey threatened.  
  
The turtle rolled his eyes with a huff, “Pfff, that’s all you got Case-man? Whatya afraid of? A real bet? Wooo are you scared of me winning?” Raph shake his hands before him to mock the human then added, “Chicke-N!”  
  
Hitting the mark, Raph smirked with a bubbling laugh stuck in his throat, when the word crossed the human’s ears, making them twitch and his left eyebrow shot up, wrinkling his forehead rolls. No one would believe he has any until you get him good and Raph knew all the stops and buttons to do so. If he kept that up Raph thought, it would stay like that forever, not even that mask of his would hide it, which was lying comfortably on top of Casey’s head. It will only come down when Casey was ready to be serious, ready for action.  
  
“Oh!” Casey snarled and threw his arms up into the air, looking to his right then left, setting his sights on his turtle friend, before dropping his arms to his side, “You have something far better… FROG FREAK?”  
  
A low growl rumbled out of Raph’s mouth as he grind his teeth, “YA! JASON WANNABE? Didja mama give you that stick to make you feel better that you're too small?”  
  
It was Casey’s turn to growl, “Fuck you, my junk is normal size…”  
  
“Junk?” Raph asked, startled by the reply, blinking in confusion. He had no idea what that had to do with anything?  
  
Casey turned red around the cheekbones, coming aware that wasn’t what Raph was aiming for.

Feeling the rush of heat now covering his face from embarrassment, he tried to hide it quickly, “What the fuck were you talking about if not my…”  
  
“Your height?” Raph pointed out that Casey was yes, taller then he, but Casey was a bit below average compared to other men of his generation and creed.  
  
“Ohhh…” Casey mumbled as the silence rose between them. The fire was now nothing but coals and both neither knew how to even restart this race they were just a moment ago pumped up for.  
  
A small wind blew by them, carrying on it a dust cloud that slowly passed between them.

Raph sighed shaking his head.  
  
“Fine, the loser will have to wash all the gear, that includes my brothers and me, and yours…” Raph started seeing Casey mutter sourly that wasn’t better than his first suggestion, ignoring the cry baby he continued, “Also will have to wash the bathrooms in the lair for two weeks then…” Raph put his finger up not finished and wanted to stop Casey from saying it was a lame punishment for the loser, “Will have to give Master Splinter ten back massages within the next three weeks.”  
  
That got the human hard, like a slap on the face, as his eyes widen in horror, “No way! I would rather Leo use me as a fucken pin cushion, then do that!”  
  
Raph grinned wildly, showing his fang tooth and tilting his head to the side, “Hah! I knew it, and here I thought you weren’t Chi…”  
  
“I’m not a chicken, frog,” Casey growled, “Fine! Deal! And no fucken way I’m losing!” Casey barked turning towards the inner deeper part of the park, they were to race through the park and towards some building on the side. From there they will have to find their way to one of the roofs to declare victory. The first to reach that roof will be the winner as the loser will be punished.

What the winner is rewarded by getting not only out of the punishment, but all bragging rights and blackmail with photos of the loser’s defeat.  
  
He lowered his mask showing he meant business and all negotiations on the punishment were now finalized. Raph stretched cracking his neck, looking over towards his buddy, “On the count of three?”  
  
“Sure, whatever floats your boat Raphie,” Casey smugly slurred out the hot head’s nickname getting a warning hiss then next, the first number.

“Three!”  
  
“Two!”  
  
“One!”  
  
The last numbered ushered, both dashed forward with their own strategy to win this, circling in their heads.

* * *

 

There was a blur of the trees in his peripheral vision, he peeked over his shoulder quickly unable to see Raphael anywhere. Which was good and bad as he thought about it, it's been over a mile that he had lost the turtle, who knew where he went or what progress he might have claimed over him.

Coughing out his growing doubt that was rooting within, he forced himself to be positive, he was a Jones after all and no freak would beat him in a challenge as juvenile as this.

In the distance, he could see the outline of it, the building that was the target and he felt a swelling pressure of hope. He was now dead certain he was going to win this, there was no way Raphael knew a better shortcut, than what he was taking.

The taste of victory playing with his tongue, he could taste the mouth-watering dessert of being the winner and couldn't wait to see that horrified look on the turtle's face when he beats him in the end.

Picking up speed, Casey leaped over a low fence reaching one of the streets. Now the fun part had to begin, he had to make his way towards the building and then scale it up to reach to the top.

If his memory served him right, there was a fire escape on the east side of the said building.

Now if he played his cards right and didn’t pick the incorrect alley that would have some thugs that needed a well-deserved beating, he should be there before he knew it.

The street around him bared no cars nor people to his luck, and it was so silent you could take it all in, but then he recalled that he had not the time to bath in the serenity of the city night and had a bet to win, a race to finish.

Rushing forward he went towards one of the alleyways and to his relief, no one was there as he made his way down towards the building.

With unbelievable and just plain down haunting luck, he found the fire escape without an issue and more so, he was able to get to it without a hitch using a garbage bin to haul himself up onto the first level of the stairs.

From there it was an easy breeze, he scaled up the ladder like there was no tomorrow, still not able to see any sign of Raphael anywhere, as he grinned devilishly.

A rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins, he reached the top feeling the cool breeze weaving through his hair and not a single site of a turtle was there to boot!

With one giant leap, he planted his two feet on the roof and he walked forward eyes open, looking about. He made sure to check every shadow, to make sure Raph wasn’t hiding just to give him a false victory.

“Well, well, well, I won!” Casey boasted, raising his arms in the air victoriously. He beat the ninja fair and square, and he was going to so love this in the end.

“That's what you think!” Raph’s voice rang in the night, as Casey turned just in time before being pounced on by the turtle.

“What the hell,” Casey cried, arms flinging up as he was slammed into the roof back first, “I won fair and square Raph,” he told him yet the turtle didn't listen.

Raph punched towards Casey’s face as he nearly dodged it feeling the dust from the roof rising from the impact of the attack. The turtle wasn’t playing games and that could have really hurt him if it hit its mark.

Quickly, Casey got his legs under the turtle, kicking him off as he scrambled to his feet only to have a mere second to raise his arms for a kick that was coming up high.

“Damn it, Raph, are you a sore loser or what?” Casey barked in frustration and anger.

The turtle not letting it go, only got fiercer with punches and kicks that were meant to hit him square in the head, the gut or any vulnerable spot.

Casey narrowed his eyes removing one of his hockey sticks from his bag behind. “If you want to play rough, then let's fucken play rough, buddy!” Casey roared charging towards the turtle as they both started to enter a fierce dance of weapon to weapon, kick to kick, punch by punch.

Not all were near misses either, many had hit their mark leaving behind pain and visible injuries, yet neither of them dared to give up regardless of the pain and swelling.

Sweat dripped and ran off their overheating bodies. Casey’s shirt and jeans were a darker shade and Raph’ mask around his eyes was a deeper red then the tail ends.

Finally achieving some distance between them, each started to pant eyeing the other one to see who was the fool to make the first move, circling around not daring to take their eyes off each other.

Then suddenly with a smirk painted on Raph’s near exhausted face, he changed the game plan, charged towards Casey with a head butt into the chest catching Casey off guard and made him plummet to the ground with a gasp of air.

The human now defeated, tried to catch his breath that was not so simply done, as he glared up at Raph who was now hovering over him with a satisfying grin on that smug green freak face.

“I guess I won,” Raph proclaimed receiving a nasty response from Casey, who narrowed his eyes in disapproval.

“Like hell you did! The winner was to be the one that got here first. Like fuck you did, since I was here first, so making me the winner bonehead.”

“Pff! Details Case-man, I beat the one that got here first so that makes me the winner,” Raph antagonized watching in pure amusement the fire burning in Casey's eyes.

“Like shit! I'm not going to let you win this because you can’t take it, like a fucken man, Frog! It's on freak!” Casey roared leaping forward and catching Raph’s shoulders throwing him down into the ground in a heap of dust.

Suddenly it was a game of do or die, winner takes all battle, not that their previous scuffle was any different….

Casey was on top of Raph, starting the new challenge, to wrestle for it, the king of the castle!

Back and forth they try to get the upper hand, breathing harder sweating more and then eventually in victory, Casey came on top, pinning Raph on to the ground with a malicious grin on his face.

“Fuck yeah!”

Casey sat on top of Raph’s plastron with his thighs squeezed against the turtle’s ribs as he had both hands holding down Raph’s so the turtle couldn’t snatch his victory once again from him.

Casey leaned forward inches away from his friend's face, staring into those golden eyes.

Eyes locked, no words exchanged, both just stared at each other, breathing in, trying to catch their breaths, making no movements. Not even Raph attempted to make any advancement to win; regardless it was apparent Casey wasn’t in the shape to stop him.

(Damn his eyes…) A voice in Casey’s head surface...

Suddenly something came over him, something inside stirred. In a blind panic, he let go of Raph’s arms quickly getting to his feet turning away from Raph yet looked over his shoulders once he had his arms crossed and back towards the turtle acting all tough and cool.

Making sure his voice wasn’t quivering or sound odd, Casey addressed Raphael in a manly voice that he could even muster, “I won so don't fucken think you did! I'll see you tomorrow I got to get back to see April.”

“What?” Raph blinked at him in awe, for the sudden wish to leave out of the blue like this. “So soon? That was just a workout, we haven't got to the juicy part yet, hell we haven’t even beaten up any purple dragons,” Raph complained slowly rising to his feet and brushing himself off.

Turning his head away to not look at Raph in the eyes, nor feel like he was some pervert gawking over Raph cleaning the below the belt area, he cleared his throat, “Yeah, well... you know her... I already promised I'll be there around nine-ish and it's almost that time by the time I get home and take a shower before heading to her place. She’s a woman and like most, she will have nothing more than complaints about how I smell of sweat, just like the last time,” Casey shrugged with a chuckle.

“I don't think you smell that bad, for a monkey,” Raph pointed out as Casey only laughed harder.

“And this is coming from the guy that crawls around and lives in the sewers? Shit, I must really smell bad then…” Casey smirked, “Oh and bonehead don’t call me monkey.”

“Then don’t call me frog,” Raph retorted, then shrugged over the smell bad part of Casey’s conversation.

“See you around frog,” Casey snickered waving goodbye, taking his leave, heading towards the fire escape and scaling down. He had to hurry, there was no time for him to waste...

* * *

 

It wasn’t that far for him to travel yet, even so, he was out of breath when he reached her place. To catch it again he placed his hand on the cold brick wall next to the door for April's building, eyes gazing over the closed door.

It would lead him to the back of the shop that was a hallway leading to a staircase at the far end, which would bring him to her apartment.

With a breath to ease his heart, he opened the door and stepped in.

He took off his mask, placing it to the side beside the door with his golf bag and brushed himself off. Biting his lip, he looked about to make sure he was alone before slipping down the set of stairs that were located to his right which would bring him to the basement.

He hurried his way to the one end where April had her laundry room, where he went to the square tub like sink, turning on the water and splashing his hands under the cold water.

The bar of soap that April left there so she could wash up if she was working in the storage room and wish not to go all the way to her apartment; he used it to wash his hands then arms.

The dirt visible he scrubbed them and he smelled his skin, making sure he didn’t smell like Raph, well more like that sewer smell he tends to have. Once he was done, he worked on his face and neck. He then ran his fingers through his hair with fresh water, not too much that it would look odd, but enough to take away any grime and be dry by the time he reaches her apartment.

“That should do,” he told himself noticing his heartbeat had slowly calmed down.

Casey turned off the water holding his breath and took a good long look towards the exit.

He focused on the surrounding sounds, hearing some to his dismay in distance stirring, yet stopped with nothing coming after. ‘Huh…’ he mumbled, then shrugged, brushing it off as one of many normal yet always over exaggerated creepy basement sounds.

He let go of that held breath, counting his luck that April wasn’t coming down there.

He didn’t want her to know he was cleaning up for reasons of course, that made sense to him at least, but for her, that was another question. Confident he was still alone, he approached the dryer reaching behind it and hauling out a duffle bag placing it on the dryer.

The old bag that seen better days still had a functional zipper, though the straps to it were duct tape for the plastic parts broke off long ago. Opening it up, all the items he left were still present as he smiled, knowing that was a good sign showing April hadn’t discovered it of yet as he took out a new fresh pair of clothes, including his heart shape boxers.

He removed his dirty clothes and place them on the side, for now, he stood there naked for a moment before putting on the boxers then took a good whiff of his armpits squinting his nostrils in protest.

To him, it wasn’t that bad but she would judge, he knew that much, grabbing the stick of deodorant and lacquer up his pits. Another test he dug his nose close, inhaling and waving his one hand, “Ah… not there yet,” he applied three more strokes to each pit for good measure.

April mentioned in the past saying she love that spice scent on him so why spread it thin?

“There,” he said contented with the aroma that she would be pleased with. Admiring the handy work suddenly he froze, turning pure white when he swore he heard something behind him. He shuddered, turning around frightfully eyeing the darkness ahead.

Nothing was there that he could tell, he took a thick gulp of saliva that got stuck in the back of his throat making it feel uncomfortable as he slowly approached the archway, peeking out in fear of seeing her standing there.

The basement, the normal creepy dank was all he could see.

Nothing what he could tell stirred, and then he jumped in fright slamming into the wall behind him, shrieking out his surprise, “Fucken rat!!”

A rodent minding its own business scurried pass him two inches from his foot, leading towards the fake wall on the other side of the basement, the one the guys used to get to April’s in a safe manner.

The rat gone, Casey growled under his breath, he hated rats, especially ones that scare him like some school girl. Thankfully Raph wasn’t there for the friend would never let that down.

The thought of Raph crossing his mind, Casey hurried up back to what he was doing, putting the new clothes on and the dirty ones in a bag and lastly hiding his duffle once more before rushing up the stairs to the main floor.

He threw the bag of clothes in the golf bag before making his way up to April’s apartment not bothering being quiet, reaching her door and knocking heavily on it.

“Coming,” she said on the other side as he took one more breath before she opened the door. He leaned on one side of the door frame all casual with one arm over his head and the other on his hip.

“Hey babe,” Casey greeted her with a smirk when she opened the door.

“Casey?” April said in surprise looking over his shoulder and between to see if he was alone before continuing, “I thought you and Raph were out tonight hunting Dragons or anything that broke the law?”

“Yeah!” Casey shrugged gesturing with his hand if he could come in, she moved back, allowing him as he entered the room. There was a smell of fresh cookies she was just finish baking and to top it off, she was alone as well, making this the perfect environment, “It never happened, Raph and I were going to do our rounds… then something came up and he went home.”

“Oh, well if I knew I would have,” she started, embarrassed wrapping her bathrobe around her figure. He didn’t notice that she was wearing only a tight tank top with short shorts under her bathrobe.

“Why, would you want to wear anything else?” he asked slyly moving towards her and playing with the bathrobe belt tugging it out of her hand.

“For I see what is going through your mind right now,” April chuckled, moving away from him and closing the door. She paused, feeling Casey’s hand brushed on her sides moving towards her front, “Casey Jones,” she warned which only fell on deaf ears.

“Yeah, babe?” Casey asked, pressing his chest against her back, then lowered his head, mumbling something to her before laying a kiss on her neck.

“Casey it's late,” she protested door still in her hand.

“Yeah and? Never stop us before. Besides is it that bad for me wanting to show affection to my beautiful girlfriend?” he asked.

“Oh is that why you're over?”

“That and to say hi,” he admitted moving his hands to her thighs, seeing her shiver, to top it off he started kissing her more on the neck, seeing the goose bumps rise on her now warm skin that was becoming hotter every second. He was turning her on and he loved it.

“How about we take this to the room?” she offered not liking to do this at the door that was still open.

“Of course babe,” he purred making her chuckle and shutting the door. He grabbed her hand gently leading her to the room as he walked backwards minding his footing. All he needed was to trip over something and fall back onto his ass, which would kill the mood.

Entering her room without incident, he quickly picked her up in the air twirling her to the bed as she let out giggles and warning him not to drop her.

He placed her down and started to press his lips against hers feeling that warmth, that taste of cookies knowing what she ate last.

The kiss let go they both started to pant, then kissed again more intense than the last letting a breath between and continuing.

April’s hand felt his side going under his shirt, exploring his chest as he smiled seeing that he was now had the permission to do the same feeling that soft skin under his rough hands. He avoided the spots she didn’t particularly like being touched and attacked the parts that aroused her.

A light moan came from her as her eyes sparkled with fire as she lunged forwards kissing him deeply and using her tongue against his.

He let out his own moan placing his hand on her thighs and worked on her shorts, by tugging them for permission she moaned again in a yes, as he slowly slipped them down.

She was wearing those hot pink panties, did she know he was going to come around?

Her hand done feeling his back, moved towards his jeans unbuttoning it and zipping them down, he helped her with his legs inching the pants off as her hand went for his dick in a matter of seconds.

He groaned, feeling how she began to massage it and her excitement growing with heavy breathing from her deed made him moan. No one could give the best handjob other than her, he thought in bliss, as she rubbed up and down with her thumb ghosting the tip.

“Casey?” April suddenly asked as Casey looked her in the eyes, knowing what she was going to say, as he felt a strike of horror wash over him, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Of course babe,” he choked out frustrated trying to hide that from her.

“Are you sure?” she asked again, feeling the still limp member in her hand, that wasn’t hardening regardless of what she did.

“Its…” Casey's eyes moved away not daring to look at her square in the eye.

“What?” April asked, concerned.

“It's… your breath… sorry…” he said guiltily.

“My what?” she let go of his dick blinking at him.

Casey coughed nervously, repeating himself and adding, “The cookie taste is a bit of a turnoff... Sorry…”

Hearing his reason, April stared at him blankly over his comment, registering it and then rolled her eyes at him annoyed, “Seriously? You could have said something before I started to get wet…”

“Sorry I thought I could…” he said, biting his lip cut off by her with her sigh of defeat.

“It’s okay, I will brush my teeth, but this isn’t over unless…” she stated as he moved over to let her up.

“Hell April I want you so badly, better hurry up sexy,” he said in a seductive tone, slapping her ass as she moved away from the bed.

She whipped her head at him, “If you do that again, I will have my way with you regardless what my breath smells like Casey Jones.”

A roar came from him, nodding to the all mighty queen. “Of course your majesty.” he grinned as she rolled her eyes once more.

When April exited the room and he laid there at the edge of the bed and once he heard the door to the bathroom close, he jumped to his feet scrambling for his pants and found the small piece of tissue that had a small blue pill wrapped in it.

He should have taken it downstairs before coming here, he should have known better.

This issue wasn’t the first time that hit him and it was starting to weigh on him. Worse was that he never told her nor did he dare to.

With the pill in hand and to his dismay, she didn’t have any bottles or glasses in her room filled with any liquid he could drink, he peeked out of the room and towards the kitchen.

It wasn’t a far trip to make and one that he could do so without raising any alarm from her, sure he could just waltz in there saying he was thirsty but he had lied enough so far to her that one more might make him burst through the seams.

With the coast clear he tiptoed to the sink and quickly cup up some water in his hand and took the pill.

He swallowed it hard and made his way back to the bedroom, he estimated she would be another five minutes, concluded from his experience since this wasn’t the first time he did this trick and he found she would go to the washroom and wash her face and who knows what else women do in that room, before coming back.

“Five minutes,” he told his dick, “you have five minutes to get it right.” He tried to pep talk it to encourage it to get up and ready to fight.

Taking a breath, he ran his hand through his hair, pacing around the room with his eye on the nightstand and looking down at it.

“Oh come on, how long does it take?”

He has done this before, yet last time the pill started working quicker than this he thought, yet he never read the instructions to find out the actual time frame for results.

This wasn’t good, he knew it and he wanted to show something before she came back and becomes discouraged to bother starting anything tonight. They had to fuck, they had to be within each other’s arms… he had to remind himself what he wants...

The talking to it approach not doing a thing, he resorted to action. Rubbing it like a lamp he tried to stimulate it taking long breaths to enjoy it. It was a minute and still, there was no progress, it was limp as a fish and flopped like one too.

What was wrong with it? What was wrong with him at that?

April was a damn hot woman that needed a good sausage between her buns… The thought of buns, her ass, that wasn’t what he was trying to visualize came invading into his mind's eye. He felt a bit warm around the collar, as the image started to shift to a green hue, yet before his mind could explore that any further, he heard April whistling at him.

As he looked up he found her fully naked and leaning against the doorframe, she had put some red lipstick to pop her lips and her tense green eyes travelled to his hand that was caught red-handed with his member that was hard and throbbing like a stallion.

“Are you starting without me? Do you want some alone time?” she asked as Casey’s expression dropped to embarrassment, trying to figure out a good enough excuse then it hit him.

He sheepishly looked at her licking his top lip, “Well thought all that work you did to rev my engine shouldn’t go to waste and make you start over… isn’t fair for you babe, so I gave you a handy cap to show you how sorry I am for,” he moved towards her, ghosting his hand on her love handles, “What kind of boyfriend would I be to make you do all the work? I’m here to pleasure you.”

“Is that so?” she trailed her finger up his chest pressing her body against his and removing that shirt of his and tossing it to the side, feeling his member rub against her inner thigh.

“Mmmm” she moaned pressing her one leg against his dick, rubbing it lightly and kissing him on the lips, “Why don’t you show me how you’re going to pleasure me, Casey Jones.”

“I thought you would never ask,” he smirked picking her up and laying her down onto the bed.

* * *

 

“Oh… god… Casey!” April screamed in ecstasy, arching her back holding onto the sheets under her as Casey was in a steady motion.

Her moans and groans were music to his ears yet why was he starting to get soft? She hadn’t noticed yet, though he had and he curse under his breath. The pill couldn’t be wearing off, could it? It wasn’t even five minutes and he hasn’t even come close to his climax, nothing!

He pounded harder hearing her moan all the louder yet still he felt at a lost, receiving nothing to keep him going.

(What should I do? What should I do?) he panicked. He didn’t want her to find out, it was embarrassing enough the path to this point just to go limp in the middle of fucking her. That alone was painful to experience, let alone he knew for sure she would blame herself when it wasn’t her, it was him.

(Think of something Casey! Anything to get yourself through this…) The encouragement full of empty hope that wasn’t going to save his ass, he was having problems keeping up the charade as he bit his lip in desperation.

Trying he must, he dared to turn those hamster wheels to find anything to replace in his head what wasn’t working, to turn him on instead. What she doesn't know won’t hurt her right? All she would know was this sex was amazing and never would be the wiser.

_(What else can turn me on other than April?)_

Random items came to mind, her playing with a dildo, it failed.

Her in sexy black lingerie, spread out with a cherry in her mouth, calling to him to take her... it failed.

The porn show that was on last night he whacked to… failed.

Some random cartoon show flashing images in his head… he was now crept out.

Then that image, the one he wanted out of his head in the first place, the cursed one that wouldn't leave him be... the pure adrenaline, the green skin, that red mask, those muscles that rippled when flexing and just moving at that. The way he moved was mesmerizing, the way he touched him... the feel of his rough skin on his…

“CASEY!” April’s voice shattered his fantasy as he stopped his thrusting and he lowered his head to her eye level, seeing they were full of tears.

“April?” Casey asked horrified, not understanding why her face was contorted in agony nor why was she crying.

“You're being too rough,” she whimpered hands trying to pry his own that were clenched to her sides.

“I…”

He removed them quickly turning white in embarrassment, seeing her once nice flush skin now the colour of blue and purple where he had a hold of her.

“I… I…” he shuddered slowly removing his member as she hissed in pain as he did so, “I’m sorry April…” he moved away from her to give her room to breathe, seeing how red she was in the face and bloodshot her eyes were.

(Oh god I hurt her… I didn’t mean too… how, when…)

“I.. should leave…” Casey turned around quickly putting his clothes on, well the ones he could find in his haste. He wasn’t sure where the shirt went, but he didn't want to take more time finding it than he had to.

“Casey…” April tried to stop him as he put his hand up heading towards the door.

“Sorry April, I got to go,” he shuddered in his shock, rushing towards the exit.

“Casey it’s okay, I know you didn't mean to,” April tried to call him back, yet he couldn’t face her not after knowing what caused him to be so aroused. He didn’t want to be forced to tell her, nor hint it at that, he just wanted to forget about it altogether actually.

Out of her apartment, he rushed down the steps trying to get his shoes on at the same time and then snatched his golf bag up. He could hear her coming to her apartment door.

“I can’t face her,” he told himself exiting the building and making a mad dash down the alleyway.

He didn’t dare stop until he was a few blocks away. Once he found a quiet alleyway for safe haven he leaned his back against the brick wall cursing under his breath.

“What the fuck is wrong with me?” Casey asked out loud, looking down seeing the still throbbing member, “Of course the fucken pill works now…” he groaned in protest and frustration.

Before moving on he took a quick glance around to make sure no perverts were around as he drew a breath.

The pill wasn’t the problem, it was the fact that he had to think of to make it even get up. Did he really just thought of… Raph... when he was having sex with April? What was he thinking? What the fuck was that all about?

_(Maybe I should take a break with our Tuesdays and Thursdays… Spend more time with April instead to get my head back in order? I’m probably spending too much time with Raph that is it… nothing more…)_

Suddenly some shuffling came from the other side of the alley, he stiffened up and briskly turned his back towards it, making his exit quickly.

He was best to start heading home and avoid people with his boner trying to greet any poor soul that would cross his way if he could help it. Like hell, he wanted to have the cops called on him for this one.

It didn’t take long before he reached his apartment building and due to his still erection that was rubbing against his pants that wasn’t in a good way, he scaled up the fire escape to avoid questions from neighbours. That was a nightmare on its own, especially the little old lady on the second floor, he might give her a heart attack.

It didn’t take him long to reach his window, sliding into this safe apartment. It being dark and a bit lonely, he ignored it as he flopped in his old worn out lazy chair eyeing his erection.

“I should tell him on Thursday, and take what a week maybe… off of hunting the New York trash? But… how is he going to take it… what should I tell him for my reason? Not that this,” he pointed to his crotch, “Is a good enough one.”

With a heavy sigh, he tilted his head back and pulled out his shell cell that was in the golf bag.

He had four miss calls, all from April...

* * *

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes love isn't simple as we wish it to be, is the person you love the one you believe you want to be with or is it the one that you can't stop thinking about? Casey is torn by this, unsure what he wants nor is he sure what he is really thinking and feeling. What is wrong with him? He can't really be into Raph... could he?  
> Disclaimer: The TMNT isn’t mine and this is just a fan fiction writing. No money is being made on this story.  
> Warning: Rape/Non-Con, Sex description/elements, Violence, Gay and so on.  
> Please don't read if you don't like these genres. Thanks.

She stood there patiently within the ancient elevator, humming a short tune to herself while she stared at the door. When it gave its normal sharp ding indicating she has arrived at her destination, she plastered a fake smile on her lips before the door slid open and she stepped into the lair.

It was strangely quiet for the afternoon hours, other than some old leather drumming to the beat of a ninja’s footing, which came from her left.

There the red mask turtle was doing rounds with his worn-out punching bag, shifting his feet gracefully around it.

“One… Two… Three…” Raph huffed striking the bag that April felt sorry for. “One… Two… Three…” he chanted again, then shifted his head towards her not losing his stance or rhythm, “Hey, Ape!”

“Hi Raph, there’s no Mikey to use instead?” she chuckled as a wild, amusing smirk crossed his lips on the suggestion.

“Nay! The bone head isn’t here, off with Fearless doing something boring by the sounds of it,” he told her thrusting his fist at the bag that swayed around from the impact. “So whatcha up to?”

“Oh looking for Donnie, is he home? I would have called, but my battery is messing up yet again and not charging,” she sighed with a slight annoyance in her voice.

“Yar,” Raph pointed behind him, “the geek is in his lab, I haven’t seen him drag his sorry corpse out of there since he entered last night.”

April’s expression went grim, as she slowly peered over towards the lab’s direction, “An all-nighter again?” she asked with a heavy-hearted sigh, knowing the answer that was obvious.

Raph only shrugged hitting his bag, then tossed her a ‘who knows’ look before jumping back into it, counting under his breath.

Nodding him a ‘catch you later’, she turned towards the lab wearily, tense over what she will encounter. She strongly didn’t want to be the one to discover a dead turtle, with the cause of death lack of sleep, which was Leo’s job, not hers.

_(Might as well just see what he is up to; if he is on the ground I should just poke him with his bo staff? That'll be safe, right?)_ Making her way to the lab, she found the door was shut tight however not locked. She gave two knocks that were common for her and she opened it inviting herself in.

No protests to her entering, she continued and then closed the door behind her hissing slightly from twisting her body.

“Morning, April,” Donnie greeted her from his desk, not raising his eyes away from his work.

“I’m afraid to be the bearer of bad news, Donnie… it’s the afternoon,” April smiled, then shook her head, walking up to his desk.

“It is?” His eyes rose towards her as he continued using a soldering tool on some metal bracelet.

“Yes, it’s two pm,” she told him, then pointed to his work to indicate he shouldn’t continue working on it when he is looking at her, he might hurt himself. Turning off the soldering tool he placed it down and tilted his head up at her.

“Okay... sorry I got side track,” he admitted biting his lip in embarrassment, and then pointed to something beyond her, “Can you grab me that screwdriver?”

“Oh sure,” April turned her body that was struck with pain from her sides that she tried to hide by complaining to him instead, “You really need to keep better tabs with your time…”

April’s hand almost on the screwdriver, suddenly she shuddered with a yelped when she felt the side of her shirt pulled up. She quickly flashed a look, witnessing Donnie holding her shirt up and in a panic, she snatched the fabric from his hands and narrowed her eyes at him in shock.

“Donatello!” she growled as he raised his hands up quickly just coming aware how bad that might have looked. “What do you think you're doing?” she demanded an explanation over the rude action.

“Sorry April I didn’t mean to make it look perverted, I mean it,” he rambled quickly feeling those eyes like lasers piercing through him.

April started to flatten her shirt as if it was full of wrinkles that needed to disappear as she grumbled, “Then why?”

Donnie paused for a split moment, collecting his thoughts and words as he bit his bottom lip, “For when you entered and shut the door you look like you were in pain, then when I got you to grab me the screwdriver turning your body you once again appeared to be in pain. I know you're the stubborn type and I was worried something was really wrong so…”

April blinked at his innocent act placing her hand on her face, “And you thought you were best to just take a peek to get the answers, instead of playing the ‘are you okay’ game and getting nowhere. Which would only make you continue wondering and worrying…” Sadly, she knew she would avoid it if he did ask and Donnie was one that understood her behaviour and would anticipate that reaction.

“Yes…” Donnie rubbed the back of his head shyly with guilt, not considering approaching this in another way, “Sorry I guess my approach was inappropriate…”

“It was,” April nodded, then cross her arms and let out a heavy sigh, “But it does have merit. It shows you care.”

“I do, your my best friend April and if your injured it does concern me…” he told her then trailed off thinking over the results of his actions and what he saw, “Did Casey do that?” he pointed to her side, “It's the shape of a hand by the looks of it and I don’t think you can achieve the same bruise from self-infliction nor…,” he explained then thought to add the oldest excuse in the book so she can’t avoid the question, “ falling into a coffee table.”

“He did,” she started, then saw the sudden rage building up in Donnie’s eyes something she knew he was capable of, yet was a rare sight, she quickly and reluctantly explained before he got the wrong idea, “We were having sex…”

“Huh?” Donnie snapped out of his anger and blankly looked at April in surprise, “I never taken you for one that likes…”

“I don’t,” she spat quickly as he took a step back.

“Sorry I don’t mean to pry… but why do you… well, have those bruises, if you’re not into that kind of kink?” he choked out not trying to anger her.

She bit her lip with hard eyes staring at the ground and Donnie could see something was wrong, “April? I… I know I might not be the number one choice for you to talk about your relationship with Casey, but it’s obvious that you need to…”

“Last night, he started to get aggressive during…”

“Did you tell him to stop?”

She nodded, “I did, but he was so zoned out that it took me a bit and almost crying before he realized what he was doing…”

“Really?” Donnie was surprised, “I would say if he wasn’t human he was in a mating trance, maybe something was on his mind… Is he always like this?”

April shook her head, “No, I mean in the beginning he was too rough, but he eased up when I told him I couldn’t handle that.”

“Now he is starting again, I’m assuming? Or was this the first time?” He moved a chair towards her, insisting her to sit as she was hesitant shaking her head frantically. “April?” he raised an eyebrow as she turned white, “is there something else wrong?”

She shuddered that only made the turtle more concerned, “April?”

“I... can’t sit down,” she admitted in a low voice.

“Why?” he asked, noticing her uneasy stance, and was alarmed by the smell that rolled off her. He made his way to her placing a hand on her shoulder to comfort her as she started to tear up.

“Last night when he lost himself suddenly he started to…” she gulped, then had pleading eyes towards Donnie, “Please don’t judge him… I don’t blame him… but it did scare me…”

“I promise I will not judge you or him. I know he is a good guy and he would never truly harm you, but if something is wrong with him it might be best we talk about it.”

“He was having sex in the normal way then suddenly he pulled out when I was about to ask him what was wrong, he shoved himself into my rectum….” she sniffled recalling the event flashing in her head, “It hurt so much I started to cry and begged him to stop… He was so far gone he didn’t hear me until he finally snapped out of it. And when he did, he was shocked he had harmed me and ran out and will not answer my calls!” she whimpered and started to cry hard.

“April,” Donnie rubbed her shoulder gently, “It’s okay, it wasn’t your fault, have you talked to him?”

“I said he will not answer my calls!” she snapped at him as he nodded quickly.

“Sorry… Sorry,” he apologized, “Okay, do you feel like he…”

“No, he didn’t rape me, Donnie, he just got out of hand… lately, he has been off…”

“Off as in what exactly?” Donnie inquired.

“I found a duffle bag in my basement with his clean clothes. I think the nights he goes out with Raph, he comes by my place, cleans up before going to my apartment,” she sniffled as Donnie put his finger up to hold that thought. He went to the back coming back with a donut seat and placed it onto the chair for her, “Here this will make it easier to sit down,” he insisted and she nodded slowly sitting down and twitching from the pain that wasn’t as bad.

“Okay, not sure that counts as odd, I mean he is out there with Raph getting into fights and wants to clean up before seeing you,” he pointed out.

“I wouldn’t think either, but… when he comes to my apartment, he lies to me saying he didn’t go out with Raph that night.”

Donnie raised an eyebrow in confusion, “Really? I don’t get why.”

April only shrugged, “I don’t either then there were the pills in the duffle bag.”

“What! Casey is on drugs?!” Donnie gasped in shock, he of all people wasn’t the type to fall victim to drugs, heck half the fights Casey gets into is to get the drugs off the streets.

“No, no,” April shook her hands in front of her, “Not that kind of drug, it was… Viagra.”

“Wait… seriously?” Donnie was more flabbergasted, “He is young, fit and not stressed that I have seen, he shouldn’t have sexual erectile dysfunction.”

“I don’t know,” April slumped, “The past months he has been doing the same routine and I don’t know what to do anymore. I want to talk to him, but fear he will blow up and block the issue to avoid it and what I am doing is not helping either.”

“What you’re doing?” Donnie asked hesitantly, not sure he wanted to ask nor if she wanted to go any more personal with him with this.

“I have…” she looked away from him embarrassed, “Been acting…”

“Acting?”

She sighed, then looked at him with a glum expression of guilt on her face, “I have been acting out my orgasms and making sounds to indicate I’m enjoying our encounter when in reality I’m not… He has been, I don’t know… not satisfying, no matter what I do…”

“Oh…” Donnie's eyes widen, and then he bit down hard on his bottom lip, “Well then… Um…”

“I know, I’m despicable… disgusting to do that…”

“No, that's not what I’m thinking at all, I understand, in a way… Mostly for if you look at it this way he is taking a drug so he can have sex with you, which appears to me, a force act on his part, by what you’re telling me. This now brings up the issue of him becoming aggressive, which could be a combination of that fact and maybe a side effect from the drug.” Donnie thought over it with his tongue slightly out showing how the gathering of information he had so far was circling in his head like a puzzle that he had to solve.

“Then again, it could just be for he is what I strongly figure, he is forcing himself to have sex with you on who knows what reason, I wouldn’t have the faintest idea, and the fact he can’t do it with ease or help from a pill could be stressing him out and altering his demeanour that is uncharacteristic. I wonder why he is…” ,” Donnie trailed off, not sure if that made sense or was something he should have said, for the facts were not all there for him to make any concluded conclusions or assumptions.

Yet the point of this he had to tell her at least since she had given him any response just staring at the floor, “Either way he is faking if you think of it that way, April.”

She still not saying anything he closed his eyes taking a deep breath pushing the pain inside his own heart overseeing her like this, to be experiencing this and being so lost.

He wanted to be more of a help for her yet he wasn’t sure if what he was doing was only making matters worse. “April I’m no love turtle, I have never been in a relationship before, but I do know this, in a healthy relationship both partners are on the same page regardless of the subject. It appears you two are not, and that will in the end, affect other aspects of your relationship.”

April shot him a look making the turtle quiver as he rose his hands up again in defence, “I’m sorry to patronize you on this…”

“No,” she shook her head with a heavy heart, “I know you're right, it’s just harder to hear someone saying it out loud, I mean it’s simple to ignore it and wish it to go away.”

“But it’s not going away,” Donnie pointed out as she agreed.

“No…”

Getting up from his seat he made his way to her giving her a warm hug, minding her sides not to hurt her, “Then when you two are able to talk again, it might be best that you two figure this out. If Casey needs to talk to someone I’m here as I am for you.”

April chuckled, “I don’t think he would like that idea, not saying he hates talking to you, it’s just we are good friends and he doesn’t want to let you know his problems with me.”

“So he is not comfortable, fair enough,” Donnie said, “I will respect that, but either way you two need to talk before something escalates and your relationship is on the line or worse.”

“I know, I will,” April licked her bottom lip nervously.

Smiling sweetly Donnie rubbed her shoulder once again, “Let’s drop the subject for now and work on something else shall we?”

“Sure,” April said softly, then gave Donnie a peck on the cheek before getting up to her feet, “Thanks Donnie for understanding and listening to me.”

“Any time April,” Donnie smiled brightly, feeling the cheek that got the kiss. Feeling the little heat rising, he turned towards his desk before she knew he was becoming red and focus on what he wanted to talk to her about, “Now I have something to show you April and need your input.”

* * *

 

There was far in the distance the repetition of alarms echoing in the night. He ignored it, crossing his legs while he leaned against a wall, tapping his thumb on his side impatiently waiting for the late friend. He was nervous with clammy palms, he had to play this cool he reminded himself for the, what, hundredth time now?

_(Come on Jones, man up why are you acting like a pussy?)_

“There you are,” Raph called behind him scaring him half to death. Casey jumped out of his skin and spun around growling at the friend, for one scaring him and the second acting like he was the one that was late.

“Been here for a half hour,” Casey crossed his arms.

Raph paused, studying him up and down, “Huh? Weren't we to meet near the park?”

Casey rolled his eyes, “That was last Tuesday.”

“Really… shell,” Raph scratched his cheek, “My bad.”

“It's cool,” Casey told him, letting out a sigh, “Anyways we need to…”

“Come on, later,” Raph interrupted him going to the edge of the roof, “I got some juicy info on the way here. We got to check it out.” With that, Raph didn't say another word leaping to the next roof.

“Wait…” Casey extended his hand a bit too late. He watched Raph reaching another roof ahead of him.

“Fuck sakes, of course, he lags this out…” he grumbled and gave in. There was no point standing around, it will only give Raph a more of a head start than he already had on him. Once he finds out what got the turtle all excited over, that is when he will crush him with his news.

* * *

 

The smell of sweat and blood was heavy in the air as he twirled his hockey stick once more slamming it forcefully against a Dragon's face.

A splatter of red crimson liquid splashed against the brick wall to his right as he continued on working on the other two he had in his sights.

His partner in crime somewhere behind him smashing ahead against another, finishing off his two remaining opponents as Casey grinned devilishly feeling more alive than ever.

These were the moments that he lived for, the moments that he thrived for, the moments that he just dreamt about.

These are those times that you can't just make up they're a dime of a dozen and he couldn't ask for more.

“Hey Case we have a runner,” Raph barked in amusement staring at the lone Dragon that ran for his life, the other two he was handling were on the ground unresponsive, but yet still alive, though they probably wish they weren't after what he has done to them.

Twisting his hockey stick to the left and then turning it around so that the handle was facing before him, Casey thrashed it forward smacking the guy in the nose that was coming after him with a knife.

The hefty man screamed in agony, clasping his bloody nose that dripped down his mouth. Suddenly, as if it was revelation the thug’s eyes widen open, as he trembled in fear over Casey’s mask and wild eyes that peered through the eye holes.

“Do you want to switch? Is that even an option?” Casey asked over his shoulder.

“Be my guest.” Raph offered, moving to the side pointing towards the direction the man fled to, “I know you like the chase so I left him for you.”

“Aren't you so kind,” Casey mocked, then roared in a peal of laughter kicking the man that he was dealing with to the ground and started to walk away. “I'll have him down in two shakes,” he boasted, then pointed behind him, indicating to Raph that he had to finish that one off.

Raph's grin grew wider as he looked at the man that was shuddering under his golden eyes, to make things perfect for himself, he started to crack his knuckles as the man started to beg for his life.

“Please, I didn't do anything I was just following…” the pitiful excuse of a man whimpered and begged, “don't kill me I didn't do nothing…”

“Shell if I was going to kill you, trust me buddy, you wouldn’t be able to beg me not to... Though when I’m done with you, you would wish I did,” Raph sneered, cracking his knuckles once more, moving forward quickly as the man screamed for dear life.

Casey a block away could hear those screams as he started to laugh under his breath.

He had to admire how terrified Raph always made them feel like they were going to die when reality Raph would never stain his hands of the blood of someone so unworthy.

He understood and under that rule, there were many other ways to get some satisfaction out of the dirtbags in the end. For one example that tends to be the best part, is that pure fear in their eyes because of them, it’s the most joy both of them get. So why not play with their prey before knocking the trash out, makes the game a lot more fun that way.

The Dragon not far ahead, Casey bit his lip striding forward, seeing if there was a way to make up for his late start. That is when he saw an opening, there were a few fire escapes close to each other that were perfect. He climbed up the first, then leaped to the next and the next, and to his pleasure, the man had no idea he was on his fat ass, actually daring to pause to grab his breath like he was in the clear.

_(What an idiot!)_

With a battle cry “Goongala!” Casey leaped into the air, crashing down with the glory of his mighty hockey stick.

The man taken by surprise was unable to usher a sound before the holy wooden stick threshed down to his skull. When Casey’s feet hit the ground the prey flopped in a heap of dust.

“Damn that was too easy,” Casey complained, coming up beside the guy giving him a swift kick to the side, there was a moan of life as Casey sighed, placing his hockey stick against the back of his neck and hanged his arms around it.

“Better get back to Raph,” he told himself turning around on the ball of his heel starting to whistle a tune on his way out of the alley.

This was satisfying he had to admit, but this batch of fuck faces were on an amateur level, not much a challenge for himself if he was alone. There were becoming nothing more than flies and in a way was disappointing.

Where were the inches to death fights, of the good old days? He swore the Dragons were recruiting in desperation to increase their numbers and accepting anyone. Yet how could anyone blame them?

After Hun took the dirt nap a year ago their new leader was a moron and the Dragons that were so feared became nothing but a joke, a joke he was tired of wasting his time with.

Entering the alleyway where he left the turtle last, he could see the red mask flapping in the shadows of a fire escape. “I don’t know about you Raph, but these guys are…”

“Boring to bother with?” Raph finished, agreeing with Casey. He leaned forward, picking his teeth with his sai, “We need to step our game up, maybe look at that new gang up north. They have been packing the heat lately and I heard from Miss Muffet that you left me to deal with, said the Golden Triangle Gang have been snatching up the Dragon's territory.”

“Really? Huh, is that the gang in the Chinatown district?” Casey crossed his arms, recognizing the name yet wasn’t sure if that was the gang from there or not.

“That’s the one,” Raph confirmed. He leaped off the landing to the ground next to Casey, “We might want to look into this gang and of course demonstrate that this hood is not theirs to claim.”

“Yeah,” Casey nodded, then remembered what he wanted to tell Raph, “But first I have to…”

“But we will have to wait though, I won’t be hanging with you for the next two weeks or so,” Raph cut in walking forward then turned around with a frown on his face.

“Why?” Casey had to ask feeling his heart skip a beat. He was the one that was going to break the bad news that they need to put their patrol runs on hold until further notice. Of course, he wasn’t going to say why he just needed a break and now Raph was doing it instead? This hit him hard and made him feel empty some reason, regardless this should have made it easier... even so, yet it actually hurt?

“That time of year,” Raph shook his head and raised his hands up in the air. For a moment Casey blinked at him in confusion and Raph just explained it once again to him, “Don thinks we will be going in our mating cycle and you know how,” Raph coughed, “Unpredictable and chaotic we get…”

Casey shuddered suddenly hearing that terrifying word, ‘mating’, remembering the last time, the horror he faced. In the four years he knew Raph, the first two years he had no clue about the mating season as the brothers made themselves scarce and he never questioned it.

The third year, that was the first time he found out, yet Raph only vaguely told him what it was about. They hit what they call mating cycle that was once a year when their hormones are so high it affects their mood, actions and would make them act out of sorts.

He didn’t learn what that meant entirely until later that week when he dared to go to the lair, he figured Raph was telling him some tall tale it couldn't be that bad right?

He was dead wrong!

Luck may have it, he ran into Leo and as Donnie explained later, for Casey being a male and because of his personality, Leo perceive him as a threat and rival, which ended with him running for his damn life, to the point he had to flee New York to void Leo’s blade that wanted to execute him.

Leo was so messed up he track him and April to a location the turtles didn’t know of and tried to kill him in his sleep. If April wasn’t there to give Leo the word of reason, he would have been dead. After that Casey learned his lesson and didn’t dare go anywhere near the lair during their cycle fearing to repeat Leo’s wrath. After that day he had much respect for Leo more than anything and was happy he was a friend than a foe, in the end.

“Yeah…” Casey coughed out feeling a cold chill going up against his spine, “I will be the next state over during that time…”

“Geez Case-man, Leo isn’t out for your blood that you have to leave town,” Raph barked in amusement that Casey didn’t see it that way.

“Ya tell my damn neck that, it was a nightmare and he wouldn’t stop,” Casey reminded Raph, over how serious that was and how close it was that he almost lost his life from someone he called a friend.

Raph sighed shuffling his feet, “Okay, I get it, but don’t worry... Fearless will not be hunting you, for last year he didn't see you as a threat...”

“Not going to ask what that means and sure…”

Raph smirked, “Just stay in town Case, you don’t have to worry about Leo I will make sure of that okay, you got my word.” Raph came up to him offering his fist as Casey rolled his eyes, bumping it and doing the next few actions that came with it ending with a slap of hands with each other.

“I will take your word on it, Raph,” Casey shook his head with a smile, “If my head gets pegged on Donnie’s bo staff displayed before your home, I will haunt you in the afterlife,” he kid, getting a laugh from Raph.

“Well, if that happens I will still keep you as a friend, taking your head out for some fun in the town… besides it sounds nice I will never worry that your off having fun without me,” he said morbidly as Casey just stared at him scuffing a ‘thanks’.

Before Casey could remark about that his cell suddenly rang. “It’s April,” Casey said, looking down at his cell yet could see the corner of his eye the disappointment on Raph’s face. Ignoring it, he flipped the phone open and answered it, “Hi,” he could only say since he hasn’t talked to her since that night he hurt her.

“Hi Casey, I was wondering if you're not busy, do you want to come over?” she said nervously.

Casey nodded to himself, “Sure I will be there in a bit.”

“Good, come alone,” she informed him as he told her sure and then hanged up.

“I got to…” Casey started, then noticed Raph wasn’t there anymore, circling around he couldn’t see the turtle anywhere.

His voice dropped, he sighed, “See ya in a few weeks buddy…”

The feeling of disappointment and heaviness filling him, he turned around dragging his feet out of the alleyway and headed towards the direction of The Second Time Around was. Maybe April will cheer him up since he felt so down in the dumps.

Was it that Raph just took off without saying bye or the fact he will not see him for the next couple weeks?

Then again, why would that bother him? He wanted this right? In order to get himself sorted out and get back on track with April before she discovered he has been having some issues of late, this was just perfect timing and the situation to get that done.

Just down right not understanding this, he pushed way the confusing mixture of feelings to the side and found himself in a dead run, he needed to talk to April it will solve everything.

* * *

 

“Come in,” April called beyond the door as he entered.

He didn’t bother getting cleaned up this time around, fully geared still. When he entered the room his heart stop seeing there on the coffee table was the duffle bag he had in the laundry room, he felt a slight cold run up his spine as he tried to act normal as if he wasn’t sure why it was there nor it was his.

“Hey April, you wanted me over?” Casey asked, placing his golf bag down near the door.

“Yes,” she answered that was flat with no emotions, “Casey, can you take a seat?”

“Sure babe,” he walked towards her to join her on the couch, yet she shook her head pointing to the chair opposite of her instead. He did not argue taking a seat, feeling the thickness in the air.

(Ah shit this isn’t good…)

“April…” Casey started going to give an excuse why he had the duffle bag yet she cut him off with her hand taking the lead instead.

“Casey, I know lately you have been lying to me and why I'm not entirely sure,” April began as Casey's face turned white.

“April I can…”

“Casey just hear me out, please. You have been distracted and I notice you, yes, come over to spend time with me, but just to relieve yourself I guess? I’m not sure what you’re trying to do only that I found your duffle bag last week and found it had Viagra. Are you having problems?” April asked as he fell silent and his eyes drop to the floor as his hands clenched together. He was right this wasn’t good, what was he to say about that?

April not giving him a chance to figure something out she continued, “If you're then that is okay Casey, it happens to men and women that isn’t something to be ashamed of... But…”

“But?” Casey lifted his head quickly catching those deep green eyes.

(She says she doesn't care that I’m having issues yet then she says but? Is there something else?)

April’s eyes lowered and sadness filled her features and her hands went to her side, “But that isn’t the issue here is it? As I said, you come over to see me for sex yet it's obvious other than that there is nothing else between us anymore…”

“What the hell April,” Casey spat with his voice rising as he placed his hand on his leg, “What do you mean there is nothing else between us? I love you, don't you know that?”

“Do you Casey? Love me as a girlfriend, not a family member?” April asked him as he froze on the question, she bit her lip when he couldn't respond, “Casey I see the way you look at me, if you’re not in the mood to play around you don’t have that spark in your eyes anymore, not the same spark you had when we first dated.”

“I…” Casey tried to speak yet his world started to spin around.

“You don’t really appear happy when hanging around me like you prefer to be somewhere else or with someone…” April words trembled by the last part as she saw the signs he was not thinking of her anymore, she was just there to substitute or to be used as a tool to satisfy himself. Not that she believed he was doing it deliberately, more on the subconscious level since she could tell he hasn’t admitted to himself he was doing this.

“There is no one else April!” Casey trembled frantically trying to see some hidden camera to reveal this was just some prank, “Babe you're the only girl for me.”

April's eyes tear up, she looked at him shaking her head, “Casey I know you're not cheating on me, but we both know that what we had, isn’t there anymore. I guess it was a fling…”

“A FLING!!” Casey burst out in frustration and anger, “I fucken love you April and you think my feelings for you is a damn fling!”

“Casey…” April cried outstanding to her feet quickly as he was already on his, going towards the door.

“Fuck this April if you don’t want me around then I’m leaving, I don’t need this shit,” he growled feeling the fires burning not sure why he was so. Maybe this was a mixture of things weighing heavily on his shoulders and now with her point of view over their so-called make believed relationship, just tipped him off. First Raph isn't going to be around, having his girlfriend accusing him of liking someone else and then topping it off over how his head has been messing with him, he just had enough.

“Casey…”

“We are both frustrated… we will talk another time, later April…” he spat out. He was too close to flapping his mouth, which he would regret later, he was best to cool down elsewhere before trying to convince her that she was the one for him.

“There is no later,” April quickly said as his hand hovered at the door handle. The room turned dark and his heart stopped beating as he turned white in fear hearing those words that came next.

“Casey I think we shouldn’t date anymore. I’m breaking up with you, this is for the best, we both need our space to figure out what we want.”

Casey hovered there in the void, “Space…” the word crackled like thunder in his head, “Space…” He turned the handle with a heavy heart and slammed her door behind him. He rushed down the stairs, ignoring the abrupt crying that came from her apartment, he just wanted to leave before he lost his temper… Before he too broke down over not believing it was over between them...

* * *

TBC

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes love isn't simple as we wish it to be, is the person you love the one you believe you want to be with or is it the one that you can't stop thinking about? Casey is torn by this, unsure what he wants nor is he sure what he is really thinking and feeling. What is wrong with him? He can't really be into Raph... could he?  
> Disclaimer: The TMNT isn’t mine and this is just a fan fiction writing. No money is being made on this story.  
> Warning: Rape/Non-Con, Sex description/elements, Violence, Gay and so on.  
> Please don't read if you don't like these genres. Thanks.

_Clink, clang, rattle, clink._

He walked forward with the six pack he held onto as his eyes glazed over, staring at the ‘you have one new message from April’ highlighted on his cell. It was two days old and during that duration, he didn’t bother to open it.

What did she have to say?

It did plague him and his curiosity was willing to find out, even so, with his heart broken, messed up as it was, deep down he truly didn’t wanted to acknowledge the horrible truths it might hold for him.

Was she going to say sorry?

How about saying she was suddenly with someone, which that particular thought was devastating to even joke about!  Clearly by factoring his state of being at the current moment that scenario was worse than a gun to his head...

The thousands of questions and possible outcomes swirled darkly in his mind, clawing at his heart and soul that was being torn apart piece by piece not killing him fully, leaving him alive to suffer and by far the worst part was him being dry as he was, allowing the pain to linger on the surface. So much he longed to open this pack up and drown himself, to bury this heartache and fall to the delusion all was well in Casey’s town.

Hell, he would have already been in nirvana if it wasn’t the annoying fact, his stash didn’t run out already.

It made no sense, though, he swore he didn’t drink that much since he had a keg, three packs of twenty fours and a six-pack hidden in the closet for emergencies, the last time he checked which was a few days ago.

Oddly, all of it was gone this morning and after he ransacked his place he fell short, not finding any, not even one single drop at that!

This discovery disappointing, he didn't even bother to clean up wanting to hurry to the store, however, he had to stop himself, for good reason. Being still day he didn’t want the worker on the day shift at the beer store to recognize him and deny selling any more booze. He had to wait it out and which only tormented him more, since it was pure torture sitting in his place with not one ounce of liquor about, alone with his thoughts, a very unstable dangerous situation...

The only thing that got him by was there would be a reward in the end, a hope to come... Unlike the day person the night guy would be willing to serve, however, had a reputation to be a bit picky on large sales.  With that as his only disadvantage, he had little choice to accept that a six pack was only going to keep him company, which would have to do for now.

“Hey, buddy, are you going to buy that or hold it until it’s pissed warm?” a voice asked him from behind. Annoyed, he turned around to tell the lady to mind her own business, regardless he was in a lineup and he was next since the clerk was waiting for him to make the purchase.

“Listen…” Casey turned around, yet saw no one at his eye height. His eyes slowly drop down at the sweetest looking old lady he has ever seen, there was no way she was the one that said that to him right?

“Well are you, sonny, going to buy or not?” the lady asked again, rattling her cane at him in a fury.

Casey turned red nodding, then his eyes settled upon the strongest Vodka the store had to sell, that stuff would put him under the table with a sip, how can this lady drink it? Was it even for her?

 

The little old lady seeing where his eyes were gawking she smiled sweetly at him, “It will put hair on your chest,” she boasted making the clerk suddenly burst into laughter and stunning Casey not believing what his ears heard.

“Say what?” he asked.

“It will put hair on my chest, now hurry up, it's late and its calling,” she said all innocent as the clerk behind them was about to die from laughter.

“Umm… how about you go first mam,” Casey insisted, as the woman didn’t say a word going around him and eyeing the clerk who instantly straightened up quickly, taking her vodka and ringing it in.

Casey could only sigh, “Only at night,” he mumbled under his breath, looking back at the cell walking to the counter when the old lady was done and on her merry way.

The clerk didn’t say much ringing it up and telling him how much he owed. Casey in response only nod, giving the guy more than what it cost looking at the cell still.

“Keep the change,” he told the guy grabbing his beer and exiting the store still eyes glued to the cell as his thumb hovered over the notification. Once he was outside and to the side out of the way, he bit his lip not seeing what was the point to torment himself any further than he has. He was best to get this over with and figure out what she wanted.

With a click, the message popped up.

‘Casey the guys have gone into their cycle, don’t worry about Leo since Donnie this year has created wristbands that prevent them from leaving the lair. They can’t remove it until their cycle is over.’

That was it, there was nothing more to the message, nothing about them, or what happened between them, as he felt a bit disappointed. He should have known it wasn’t going to be anything other than that.

“So they started two days ago,” he grumbled, he hadn’t tried to text Raph after the breakup, besides he knew it was going to start at one point or another anyways.

There being no point to responding back to her since it was old news and she didn’t follow up on her end anyways, he placed his cell away and shifted his beer looking around seeing the night was quiet as he made his way home.

* * *

 

His building shrouded by silence, he made his way up the worn out wooden staircase that cracked and popped on every footstep he made which echoed off the walls.

There was no other disturbance as he secretly wished there was to make his world feel less lonesome. He never thought once how lonely he could feel, not since April’s decision to break up and with the fact right now there was no Raphael to keep him company either.

Years ago, he strived to be a lone wolf, with no friends or anyone he would allow to get close to him, and even then it never bothered him really. It was the norm and something he was used to without giving it a second thought.

There would be days he would dejectedly sit in his chair in his apartment planning the next encounter with the Dragons, that was the only thing he looked forward to, day in and day out.

His only purpose back then what made him continue living.

Yet now with so many years of that part of his existence replaced with a new one, he was accustomed to being around others. The notion and action of being alone only made him long for someone to talk to, goof around with and just gravely sought out to have another living soul to interact with, whom he didn’t have to beat the shit out of, of course, repeating his old habits.

The darkness closing in on him within this staircase, he quickened his steps towards his floor and reaching his door in a timely manner. Yet when he was finally there he froze up stiff, with much hesitation reaching for his keys, knowing once through these dwelling feelings would only escalate and in truth, this beer probably wasn’t going to fix it either…

With a heavy sigh, he unlocked the door and entered his empty, unwelcoming apartment. Once in, he closed the door behind sluggishly walking in the dark towards the island to place his beer down and put away his keys. When the charm of his key hit the pottery suddenly to his shock the lights flashed on, blinding him as they did.

“What the hell?” he got out then shuddered when someone responded behind him near the door, hearing the lock being turned.

“No point putting that in the fridge you're not going to be needing it.”

His breath became short as he stared forward fearful to turn around as a lump in his throat made his voice shaky, “Raph?”

_(How? April said they are under house arrest in the lair!)_

“Who else would it be?” Raph churred in amusement.

Not used to that from Raph only hearing the sounds of a churr from once out of Mikey who was overjoyed receiving a new game, he wasn’t sure what it was implying to in this situation.

Slowly not daring to take any rash movements he tried desperately to see if he could escape the apartment before Raph fillet him, for why else would he be there?

_(Great first Leo now my best friend?)_

“Raph… what are you doing here, buddy?” Casey said nervously seeing the turtle leaned against his door and to his dismay, he figured Raph had locked it by the sound prior.

“Oh, just wanted to see you, has been a couple of days and haven’t heard from you,” Raph shrugged with his eyes dangerously eyeing him up with those bright golden orbs.

“Well was told you were in your cycle… why are you here… I thought Donnie…” Casey rambled taking a step back for Raph was taking subtle steps towards him. Casey cursed under his breath not having his gear out that was of course in the closet near the front door.

(I could run to the bedroom, lock it and escape out of the window before he breaks the door down… then what?)

“Yeah Donnie’s little collar... wasn’t in the mood for wearing it,” Raph pulled out a metal wrist band and tossed it on the counter that slid into the beer case with a clunk and rattle.

“Why not? I mean you know that…”

“What’s wrong Case-man you think I’m here for blood?” Raph took a step forward, cracking his knuckles and licking his upper lip.

 _(Oh sure he isn’t…)_ Casey could only think fearfully, seeing those signature signs Raph does when he is ready to cause hell.

“Well, I have to go too... April’s…. Raph…” Casey started seeing the annoyed look wash over the turtle’s face.

(Running isn’t a good idea, I need to figure a way to distract him or he will bulldoze me down… Shit Casey think! What can you use?) He took another step back subtle as the others, just coming aware to his right there was a stool he could potentially use. It wasn’t the ideal object to execute his escape plan, however, beggars couldn’t be choosers as he picked it up quickly and chucked it with all his force, at the turtle’s head as a distraction, hoping he doesn’t harm Raph too much.

The stool flew towards the turtle that backhanded the object as he let out a howl of amusement.

It, as Casey figured wasn't the best option, he still made an attempt and turned around quickly to dart towards his bedroom door. Then that was when the fear of his demise set root, as he let out a yelp when he was body tackled to the ground from behind before he could even reach the threshold of the door.

He went down with a taxing thud, crashed face first and bounced his head against his wooden floor as he let out a hefty moan.

The full weight of the turtle pressed against him, Casey could feel Raph’s warm breath on the back of his neck, “Oh come on Case, we both know you and April are done for. Besides, you think I’m going to let you go so easily?”

“How do you know?” Casey strained out, trying desperately to free his hands, that were being pulled back. The turtle had clamped down his large green hands around his wrist with much force, stretching Casey’s arms out to his side and then pulled them back enough to shoot pain down them to prevent Casey from trying any attempts to throw him off.

“I was there, listening. Shell, I have seen that one coming a mile away,” he mused.

“Raph for fuck sakes that was private, not for you to eavesdrop on…” Casey barked, then shuddered when something warm and wet ran up from the back of his neck.

_( **HE IS TASTING ME!! OH** shit he is going to eat me?)_

“Pff…” Raph leaned forward as pain ran through his arms as they were pulled back further as Raph whispered into his ear, “You know it wasn’t... besides, you secretly wanted me to hear it, right?”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Casey barked in anger. He tried to break free from the hold then suddenly he had no weight on his back and his hands were not being held.

Quickly he rushed to his feet turning around to witness Raph in a fighting stance with sai in each hand. Casey debated fleeing to the bedroom once again, yet Raph diverted his attention to him.

“Get your stick, Casey. You have one minute until I carve you,” Raph smirked darkly moving to the side just enough for Casey to get past him and go for the stick that was in the closet near the door.

_(If I play along, I can go for the door and get out of this fucken alive. Damn it, why did this have to happen?)_

“Fine freak! You want to dance then lets tango!”

Casey rushed passed him trying to psych Raph by looking like he was going to get his stick, however, went right for the door. When his hand touched the doorknob, he heard a vicious growl, and before he knew it, he was nearly was missed by a sai in the head, that luckily caught the side of his cheek only which started to burn.

The worst part wasn’t the weapon that could have made him kick the bucket, no, as Casey came aware of his presence, noticing Raph was now beside him with his hand still on the sia that was now embedded in the wooden door.

_(Shit!)_

“Time's up,” Raph snarled elbowing Casey in the forehead that made him stumble back. Then, before he could even recover or anchor himself to establish his balance again, Casey let out a choking gasp, as all the air in his lungs was snatched from him as he felt a large solid foot in his gut, which knocked him off his feet and tumbling down into his lazy chair that wasn’t too far off.

The grown man hissed in agony, feeling his chest burning with the rest of his body, with the sickening potent taste of iron swirling in his mouth and trickling down his chin. Raph stood at the door disappointed, eyes with a blazing fire of rage. They were ambers shining in the darkness of his mood.

“That’s all you got?” Raph lashed out, flinging his arms about. “What the fuck happened to that guy that kicks punks asses with me? All I see is some pathetic damn chicken ass wimp, in front of me!” Raph spat in disgust.

“Raph, we are friends, like hell I want to really fight you for real, even if you’re under the influence,” Casey pointed out wiping the blood from his mouth, stumbling back to his feet feeling the pain in his ribs. He figured he must have bruised a few or one was broken, he wasn’t sure either way, but couldn’t afford it to hinder him, especially not going up against Raph like this.

The red mask turtle snorted raising his head, staring down at the excuse of a vigilante with much animosity, “Never stop you before… shell you always give me your all, never letting me have any leeway… but… oh, I get it,” Raph smacked his fist in his hand, “You're missing it… the mask?”

“Mask?” Casey asked, seeing Raph still not taking his eyes off him, yet open the closet up enough to place his hand inside to grab Casey’s hockey mask. Then the turtle’s smile brightened as he tossed it at the human’s feet. Casey cautiously watched Raph not daring to pick it up.

With a shrug, Raph took his remaining sia and lodged it in the closet, then cracked his knuckles, “Let’s play fair, then... if that is what you really want.”

Casey’s eyes slowly came to his mask at his feet, was this how it had to go down? Was this the only way out of this madness? He had to fight his friend for his life to see another day? Would Raph kill him if he didn’t try to survive?

“You're thinking too much Casey!” Raph roared in frustration leaping in the air to punch down onto him.

Casey bit his lip, drawing blood in his own frustration, grabbing his mask and rolling out of the way of the attack ending Raph slamming his fist into the coffee table cracking it with a sound of wood bending and popping.

“Fine Raph, I will bite” Casey turned towards his friend, who wasn’t in his right mind and he had to do what he had to do in order to survive, even if he had to kick his friend’s ass to do so. Casey strapped his mask at the top of his head, then slid it down that received a satisfying smile that started to form on Raph’s face.

“Oh, now we begin!” Raph roared thrusting forward kicking high as Casey dodged it grabbing his leg and directed Raph into the back of the couch.

The turtle recovered, then turned around with a punch that hit the mark making Casey stagger back into the island. He caught himself and charged forward, leaping at Raph and took them both tumbling over the couch and smashing into the coffee table snapping it in two from Raph’s hard shell. Casey landed onto the turtle, grip still on the edges of Raph’s plastron as Raph hands were holding tightly on his shirt.

“How do you feel?” Raph asked amused.

“Fuck what's your deal, shit you're not even acting like Leo,” Casey snarled, holding Raph down with his body weight.

“Duh, Leo wanted to kill you,” Raph laughed tightening the shirt in his knuckles that made the fabric pressed tightly against Casey’s back uncomfortably.

“And you're not?” Casey growled forcing his hands harder down on Raph so he couldn’t flip him off.

With a devilish grin Raph raised his head slightly, “No.”

“What…” Casey looked at him confused, “Then what the hell are you doing then?”

A chuckle came from him than before Casey could react Raph had one foot on his stomach and with a forceful kick there was a ripping sound as Casey smacked hard into the couch, which the force made it tilted back and fell with him in it.

“Shit,” Casey groaned sprawled out on the couch’s back that was on the ground now and he couldn’t see Raph since he was still on the other side, “Damn it Raph, that was my favourite shirt,” he complained seeing his shirt was clean off. Pain running throughout his body, he stiffly shuffled to his feet witnessing that Raph had his shirt in two pieces within both of his fists.

“Ah, too bad,” Raph mocked dropping them to the ground, then leaped over the turned over couch and pounce Casey to the ground. The man moaned, having Raph now on top of him.

“How do you feel?” he asked the same question as Casey just snarled.

“Sick of this game you're playing,” Casey snapped at him. Actually, some luck was on his side Casey was able to get leverage and flip Raph over making him on top, that gave birth to a new struggle, they started to play a war of king of the hill, trying to get the other one pinned down. Hot in the face and breathing heavily it was Casey that won in the end and was able to hold down Raph’s hands to the floor.

“This ends Raph, just go home already,” Casey huffed, panting over how hot the room felt.

“But we just started,” Raph grinned, eyes looking towards his crotch. Casey confused dared to look at what he was strongly indicating, to his horror he saw it, the beginning of a boner.

 _(No… noo… no…)_ Casey panicked, that was why he felt so warm around the collar.

“It’s not the first time either,” Raph admitted as Casey flashed him a look of disbelief.

“It happens every time we start play fighting you get aroused, that is why you keep running off to April… just admit it.”

“Fuck that,” Casey jumped off him stumbling backwards.

Raph sat there shaking his head rolling his eyes, “Come on Case we both know you get hot and bothered around me just let it go.”

“What!” Casey shuddered out in shock, body trembling over his friend's unexpected reasoning of his visit. Was Raph hinting they should do something about that, with… each other?! As that came to the surface, he felt sick in the stomach, “Oh god you're not here for you want to kill me... you… you…” Casey gulped in horror, as sweat ran down his brow, that he would ever say such words associated with Raph, “You’re here for you...  want to fuck me?”

“So he catches on. By the way, I call it mating, not fucking, there is a difference,” Raph informed him smirking, rising to his feet and brushing himself off.

“Like fuck that is going to happen, I’m into girls, not guys,” Casey defended himself.

(I’m only slightly hard, for he must have touched it or it rubbed against something, nothing more.)

“Stop lying to yourself, you have to use drugs to get it up around girls,” Raph air quoted, “Yet with me, it doesn’t take much, hell I wouldn’t be surprised you think about me when you try to fuck April.”

“Fuck Raph your damn delusional!” Casey snarled, charging the turtle which failed miserably, as it was him that was slammed into the wall with Raph having one of his arms behind his back.

With his body pressed into the wall, he was unable to move.

“Then I will just have to prove it,” Raph churred, licking the side of Casey’s neck.

He shuddered, “Fuck Raph, I swear if you dare…” Casey started feeling his pants at his ankles, “Put my pants back on!” he demanded as he was thrown from the wall tumbling to the ground with only his boxers on.

Raph leaned down picking up the pair of jeans, “You will not need these anymore,” The turtle pulled the two legs apart as they rip in the center and fell to the ground.

“Jesus Raph, this is insane, I don’t want you, I don’t like you that way!” Casey snarled.

“Stop lying to yourself Casey,” Raph slowly approached him as he scrambled backwards trying to get up, he had to flee, he had to get out of the apartment!

_(This is not happening, fuck his cycle it scrambled his marbles!)_

“You know what Casey I’m tired playing this game, it’s time to show you first hand how much a fake you are,” Raph darted forward, as Casey was finally on his feet just to take the brunt of the attack in the gut.

There was a firm hand on his arm as he knew sadly what was coming next, trying to prevent it he couldn’t as Raph already had all his weight to one side and him being out winded from the gut blow, his body was hurled across the room only being stopped by a wall.

He hit the ground hard trying to catch his breath, then heard two clicking noises before him. He jerked his head up seeing he was near his radiator and his hands were handcuffed to them!

“What the hell is this?” he demanded suddenly feeling Raph’s breath on the back of his neck.

“Though I love to keep this physical, we are not getting anywhere, so you will have to be punished,” Raph churred sending shivers down Casey’s spine.

“Raph okay, I get it, you're off, but you don’t want to do this,” Casey stated feeling Raph’s hands on his chest, then helped him up which he tried to resist.

With his hands restrained, he was unable to stand up fully, it didn’t help either with Raph having his legs pressed tight against the back of his, placing him in a very vulnerable position.

“Casey stop resisting me,” Raph told him, running his hand on Casey's side.

Casey tried to fight back then was shoved forward, pinning him painfully against the radiator and the turtle. Lucky for him it was the end of spring turning to summer or that heater would have been on high and his dick wouldn't’ have appreciated the hot treatment.

Teeth grinding, Casey’s heart raced in a panic, “Raph stop this!” he demanded as it fell on deaf ears.

“Shhh,” Raph softly spoke, “Or if you get too annoying, I will gag you.”

“Fuck Raph, this isn’t right,” Casey’s voice went high when his boxers were pulled down to the ground, making him now fully naked, a great peak show for his perverted turtle friend.

“Jesus, Raph, please just stop this,” Casey aggressive tone suddenly turned into a whimpering begging, he was out of steam and fear had taken root seeing how he was helplessly unable to fight back now.

He did try to move yet with his hands cuffed he was limited and Raph was making good use of the heater in front of him to keep him where he was.

A sigh came from Raph as he grumbled, “Now you did it, Casey, you sounding petty is a turnoff.”

A spark of hope rose in him, if that was the key he will play the card a full pitiful sucker to get out of this, who was he proving to be macho? All that would do was drive Raph to make this mistake, that they will both regret in the end and would destroy their friendship they both build together.

“Please Raph…” Casey started, then choked on the rest of his spiel when his hockey-masked was jerked up and something that tasted salty pulled forcefully into his mouth making him unable to close it. Then suddenly he felt something on the back of his head getting tighter with the thing in his mouth. All he could see was the blur of the colour red, unable to see exactly what it was, yet he had a faint idea.

_(Oh god, he didn’t gag me with his mask?)_

“There that is better,” Raph charmed as the gag was tightened more, “Now can’t let you try to talk your way out of this, though I will not hear you moan…” Raph sighed in disappointment, “Oh well, it’s a sacrifice I'm willing to take, besides now you won't spend all your energy flapping your gums and,” Raph paused sliding his hand down Casey’s back towards his ass stopping there and gently squeezing the cheeks. Casey shuddered to breathe heavily through his nostrils, trying to talk, which became muffled between the fabric.

“What was that? You want me to touch your thighs now?” Raph leaned forward, plastron pressed against Casey’s back. Casey mumbled, shaking his head back and forth hastily, “Oh really you want me to be gentle… or was that rough?”

_(Neither! Stop! Oh someone stop him!)_

“Mmmm,” Raph moaned licking his lips, sliding his hands across Casey’s chest feeling the rippling muscles and chest hair, he continued downwards coming to the thighs and going inwards. Then he came forward, massaging Casey’s leg muscles, breathing heavily in his ear, “I think you said rough right?”

_(No! Stop! No!)_

“It feels good doesn’t it?” Raph asked churring.

 _(No… it… what… is… that… smell…?)_ A scent lingered there invading his nostrils that flare to comprehend what it was and where it came from. Did it come from Raph? Either way, it was nothing he had ever experience and oddly it was making him feel intensely warm inside.

“Rough it is!” Raph suddenly barked and a muffled scream came from Casey, as his head jerked up with eyes widening open in horror. The turtle went down between his shoulder and neck, digging his teeth into his flesh that sprang both pain and pleasure to both.

_(No… I… this… can… stop… stop…)_

Raph let go breathing heavily as blood trickled down his mouth while Casey's now reddish skin started to bruise around Raph’s teeth impression.

“That was fun,” he said followed by the sound of a lid popping open. Raph was doing something and he couldn’t figure out what it was as the turtle was silent for a moment not touching him.

“Ready?” Raph asked as Casey tried to turn his head to see what Raph was up to.

(Ready for... shit!) Casey’s body jerk feeling something thick and hard pressed against his anus, and enter with a cold wet feeling next. His eyes widen in horror that this was going to happen, this was something he couldn’t stop, as he was weak, leaving him helpless as tears started to form.

_(Stop… stop… shit stop!)_

“Relax,” Raph told him, “It’s just my fingers, I have to prep you first or I will hurt you.”

(Hurt! Fuck this hurts!) A whimper bubbled in his throat as he was cringing, desperately trying to move away from those fingers.

The fingers in a rhythm went in and out yet not fully, as Casey breaths trembled and his chest vibrated.

_(Stop…)_

“It’s okay… just relax Casey,” Raph tried to soothe him while continuing to finger him, “I should find it soon, it will make a world of difference.”

As soon as Raph said that Casey's face turned red feeling a sense of pleasure, that washed over him pushing away the pain, and once that was achieved it was as if Raph knew, focusing on that very spot. Casey squinted his eyes, trying to not think about it, trying not to let it get to him.

_(Damn it… why does it feel so good! No this isn’t happening! I can’t... I will not... shit not that!)_

Casey struggled fiercely to get Raph to let go, as he could feel the turtle's free hand grasping now his swollen member that was betraying him.

Why was it so hard? He was being fucken raped and his dick was getting off on it? What messed up shit was this? Then there was that smell that was driving him nuts making his body tensely warm.

“There… see it isn’t that bad, now let's get to the fun part,” Raph let go of Casey’s dick as the human wish he wouldn’t for it would have delayed the inevitable.

_(No.. just give me a damn hand job if that satisfies you, just don’t. Please don’t!)_

Tears, now streaming down his cheeks, he screamed through his gag waiting for the final moment, that didn’t come, as he suddenly felt Raph move away from him.

Free from his captor, yet still handcuffed, Casey tried to straighten up his body to avoid falling into the helpless position, that unfortunately, he wasn’t able to achieve. Raph to his dismay was silent lingering behind and then to his surprise, Raph walked up to his right in order for him to turn his head towards him. Maybe Raph finally came to his senses? Was this his only window of opportunity to change the friend’s mind? Though being gagged, he didn’t have much of a way to voice himself once more.

Slowly looking up, Raph stood there, with his arms crossed with a disappointing look on his face, “Shell Casey don’t fucken start crying… Maybe if you saw it you will feel more willing?” he asked.

Casey shook his head ‘no’, as Raph barked a hearty laugh, “Oh come on, you can't tell me you're not curious? Just entering you without you seeing it is not as much fun,” Raph pointed out. Then commanded Casey to follow his hand by snapping his fingers, “I bet you have no idea where it is, do you?” Raph’s hand felt up his plastron making Casey blushed against his better judgment, Raph took off his belt and pads and let them fall to the ground.

Once again, his hand went towards his plastron and hovered over the root chakra, that would be on a human, that was still part of his plastron.

With his two fingers, he gently rubbed the center as Casey just came aware there was a bulge there that he overlooked, not that he was purposely looking for something amiss. The bulge came larger as something behind Raph between his legs dropped, that wasn’t a dick he could tell.

_(What the hell he has a tail? When did he have a tail?)_

Raph’s gold eyes studying the human, he smiled curling his thick tail, “Yeah, yeah. I have a tail. Shell I always have, I just hid it well.”

Casey’s eyes looked up in confusion on why as Raph moved forward, cupping his face with one hand, “Reason I and my bros hide it is,” Raph leaned in whispering in Casey’s ear, “For it so sensitive. Shell, just stroking it, sends unbelievable pleasure.”

Casey gulped over the new information having a deep feeling he wouldn’t understand how much and didn’t want to.

Raph, in turn, finding the reaction amusing released his hold on Casey’s face and then continued to rub the spot, which to Casey’s surprise, the center of the plastron started to part. He had always thought it was one solid shell nothing mysterious to the center seam that split down the middle giving the plastron its unique shape, mimicking muscles in a way.

From that center of the parted plastron something fleshy, that was pinky purple, poked out and then started to slowly drop from its hidden pocket. In a few words, Casey would say it reminded him of an orchid, but at the same time, it was human-like.

 _(What the fuck he wants to put that thing in me! It’s fucken huge!)_ Casey tried to move back in a panic feeling slightly insecure about the size of his own junk, compared to what he was looking at, would be classified as a pencil dick in comparison towards Raph’s large member.

(Where was he hiding that thing?) the other question crossed his mind.

“So do you like it?” Raph asked him proud of his erection. Casey could only shake his head to a no still overwhelmed by the size of it alone then what it looked like. Raph huffed in enjoyment over the face Casey had on, “Don’t be modest, don’t worry about yours, I’m not judging and besides by the end of the night it will be just right.”

_(What does he mean by that?)_

Raph moving to get behind him once more, Casey terror-stricken seeing this was going to happen, he retaliated by kicking back to prevent the turtle from getting too close to him, however, to his dismay, his foot was caught by the skilled ninja and then shoved forward, smashing into the heater as pain shocked Casey disabling him to continue fighting.

He lost the advantage and Raph was once more pressed up against him, pinning him in place.

The difference this time around Raph’s member was snug between his legs rubbing up against his swollen member, that, to his displeasure throb feeling the contact of flesh against flesh.

_(Shit shit shit!)_

“Now this will hurt a bit Casey, but I promise it will pass.”

 _(No no no!)_ Casey shook his head, trying to push himself away from the heater.

“Take a breath.”

_(Oh god, stop this… Raph don’t do this!)_

Raph placed his hand on the back of his head, slightly bending him forward to gain access without giving Casey any room to move. When Casey felt the tip of Raph’s member at the entrance to his anus, he started to shudder in fear, breathing heavily, gasping for air, as the dark reality was about to play, this was happening there was no stopping him! The helpless human quivered and to keep his sanity and the screaming in his head from driving him to madness, unable to fathom how this came to be, Casey closed his eyes tightly, then the horrifying feeling and the sound came. There was a pop as the dick penetrated and started to enter him, sliding against the walls inside.

Pure agony exploded within his body as it shook out of control, as Raph kept pressing it further in. Casey overwhelmed was unable to think, to react, shocked and horrified this was happening to him, by his best friend of all people.

“Breathe Casey,” Raph reminded him, pulling out gently and then thrust in once again. He wasn’t being overly rough yet, to get Casey to use to the feeling and pass the painful first time. He kept going in and out as Casey shuddered tears running down his cheeks. Another thrust harder than the other Raph's body vibrated in pleasure and his thick big hand hovered around Casey’s chest feeling it.

_(Stop… Stop… I don’t want this…)_

Thrust after thrust Raph let out his churrs that filled the room, and the more he did this Casey started to fail in his battle against what it felt like, as the guilty pleasure was overpowering his senses and his rational mind.

To his dismay, it started to feel good, really good, to the point, it was overriding the pain and the more the pain started to reside, the harder Raph started to get into his rhythm thrusting into him.

 _(Stop… stop… I… why… I can’t… no...)_ Casey whimpered as his eyes slowly open, having his body feel warm and his own dick throbbing and pulsing. His eyes staring at the wall to find a way for him not to fall victim to his body's betrayal, his eyes slowly notice something odd as he looked down towards one of his handcuffed hands.

 _(What the hell is… what is wrong with my hands.)_ The fear that must have been different before actually made Raph stop his deed.

“Ignore it, Casey,” Raph warned him.

 _(Ignore what? What is happening to me?)_ Casey panicked, his hand shaking that was larger than before and his skin was turning greenish.

“Ah...Shit…” Raph hissed in his own unexpected panic, exiting Casey abruptly, which made the human jerk from the rash pull out. Casey’s eyes still staring at his hands and before he knew it, before he could even comprehend what he was staring at or fight against Raph that had moved off of him, Casey was hastily turned around with his arms painfully crossing themselves above his head, in order for him to face Raph then the wall.

He then was pulled to the ground hard as he hissed in the uncomfortable position, losing sight of his hands as he was seated on to the ground.

Raph hovered over him, then took a seat on Casey’s lap, making the human dick brush against what Casey would assume was Raph’s tail, as his wet member rub against his chest.

Raph removed the gag from Casey’s mouth and wrapped it around his eyes instead, blindfolding him.

Freedom, Casey made quick use of his voice, “Raph let me go, you had your fun this is enough, shit man this is wrong! And what is wrong with...”

“Shut up Casey and just enjoy it, I know you been hungry for it,” Raph warned him.

Casey was about to ask what the hell he was up to now suddenly shuddered, letting out a moan when he felt his dick between Raph’s fingers then guided to what he knew was Raph’s anus.

He slipped in the already prepared hole that he didn’t know Raph set up prior feeling how tight and warm it was compared to a girl's vagina.

“Raph…” Casey trembled out a moan with the turtle moving his body up and down in a slow rhythm, while his member rubbed against the bare chest.

“Shhh, Case-man... This feels good…” Raph moaned keeping up the work riding Casey.

Casey bit his tongue wanting to complain, but couldn’t. The words wouldn’t come out, instead there was moans and heavy breathing.

_(Damn it… why… I… why do I want this! What is wrong with me? Shit… he feels… so… fucken… good...)_

“Casey let me know if you want me to move faster,” Raph told him as Casey found himself nodding, quivering with euphoria that filled him to the brim.

“I feel good, don’t I” Raph churred seductively, extending one hand on Casey’s shoulder and speeded up his movement which made Casey sharply snap his head back, breathing heavily accompanied by largely pleasurable moans.

“Shit yes… god, why?” Casey cried out, and then a hand pulled his head forward as his lips were pressed against his. Instead of pulling back Casey pressed harder tasting those lips and slowly found his tongue exploring more, his body was on fire and hungered, desired Raph more than anything else. His mind was invaded with pleasure and desires, he never thought he had and it was taking over. He wanted more, he wanted the full package not just having himself fuck Raph, but to be able to release himself in him, to claim him.

His body suddenly tensed and his breathing became taxing, as he could feel the threshold approaching the final showdown, “Raph… I’m...I’m…”

“Then do it, Casey,” Raph moaned, “I want you to fill me up,” he told him then sped up his pace and tightening his sphincter to deliver more pleasure.

Casey’s toes curled and he groaned louder “Shit… oh hell Raph!” Casey thrust up catching up to Raph’s effort as both a hot mess, let out groans that rolled off their tongues. Raph let out an animalistic churr locking lips with Casey as he cummed.

When it was apparent he milked him enough, Raph stopped his efforts and calmly sat still on Casey, staring at him as both breathed in and out.

“How was that?” Raph asked, placing his hand on Casey’s sweaty face.

A moan came from him as he remained silent.

_(Did.. that... Really happen? I… enjoyed it?)_

“Well, you don’t have to say anything, I know you like it as much as I did and we are not done yet,” Raph said smoothly and lick him on the cheek.

“Wait, what?” Casey yelped suddenly, feeling his body was being lifted with his arms coming down against his back with his legs in the air, help by Raph’s body between them. Raph was standing up angling Casey using the heater to get him just right.

“Now it’s my turn,” Raph churred.

“Whoa, whoa, I’m not re… shit!” Casey squeaked, feeling Raph penetrated him, yet this time it wasn’t as painful.

“Take it easy Casey, the tenser you are, the worse it will be. Get use to it and relax and enjoy the ride,” Raph instructed as Casey did just that knowing fighting was a waste of his energy.

(Damn, now this is feeling good, why? Was he right… I’m, really gay? All I wanted was him, when I was with her?)

Each thrust Casey remained silent, letting out small moans hearing Raph churring and becoming rougher in his thrusts.

(OH shit what is that?) Casey let out a gasp arching his back, feeling Raph’s hand on something that felt amazing, yet he couldn’t figure out what it was.

It was behind him near his back end and ever pounding of Raph’s member in his ass, the turtle also rubbed whatever was making him go crazy inside.

He became more vocal in begging Raph, not to stop… no, for Raph to go harder, wanting him to take him fully. In a delightful response, Raph churred animalistically, “Of course my mate.”

* * *

 

“Mmm,” a moan escaped his lips as he shifted, feeling his sheets draped around his neck and body, his head half buried by his pillow his eyes fluttered open.

Seeing the green mutant before him, passed out in his bed as he blinked in confusion.

His head throbbed and his mouth was dry and he found himself, he just could only stare at Raph trying to process what was happening, as he came aware of the light coming from between the shutters on his window.

It was morning as he squinted to force the memories to surface.

 _(What happened again?)_ Casey licked his lips rising slowly, feeling his body stiffer than he wished it to be as a flood of memories and emotions clawed out of his foggy brain.

 _(Shit… did that really happen? Was I drunk?)_ He managed to sit up and gave a long hard look at his friend, or was it his rapist? The feelings whirling he just couldn’t figure out what it was as he stumbled out of bed and almost going head first into his dresser.

“Fuck, I’m acting drunk,” he mumbled waddling to the door that was open as he sighed, seeing the condition of his apartment. It was a mess and that wasn’t the best description for it.

It looked like two horny tornadoes fucked in his apartment.

There was evidence of the deed here and there as he wasn’t sure if such stains would be possible to clean out.

There was broken furniture and horrifying of a sight to see as that was, there was one he couldn’t fathom the possibility... the radiator was ripped from the wall and lay near his front door.

“God this is worse than the frat parties I use to crash…” he dryly admitted, shaking his head and headed for the washroom. He needed to take a leak before he dared to deal with anything.

Still stumbling, waddling like some damn penguin, he reached the bathroom that was to his prayers wasn’t touched and he made his way to the toilet passing the mirror that hung above his sink.

As he did, he froze as a fear rose inside him, something didn’t seem right with the image that flashed by.

Hesitantly, he dared to take a step back, his body started to shudder as in the corner of his eyes something was there something that shouldn’t be possible.

Nervously, he turned to face the mirror shocked by the image as he lost his balance and fell backwards into the bathtub taking his shower curtain down with him. Freaking out he fought with it as he looked at the hands that were aiding him.

“What… what happened to me!” he shuddered, feeling sick and the room started to spin. “What did Raph do to me!! Oh god!”

* * *

 

TBC 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes love isn't simple as we wish it to be, is the person you love the one you believe you want to be with or is it the one that you can't stop thinking about? Casey is torn by this, unsure what he wants nor is he sure what he is really thinking and feeling. What is wrong with him? He can't really be into Raph... could he?  
> Disclaimer: The TMNT isn’t mine and this is just a fan fiction writing. No money is being made on this story.  
> Warning: Rape/Non-Con, Sex description/elements, Violence, Gay and so on.  
> Please don't read if you don't like these genres. Thanks.

**_< It’s two pm and the sun is shining. It’s 25 celsius with not a cloud in the sky. But don’t forget your umbrella though, rain is coming from the east, later on, this afternoon up to 3 mm is expected.>_ **

“Rain?” April asked, placing the dishcloth down and flicked the soap suds off her hands.

She turned towards the radio with a frown, she wanted to do some shopping that evening when it came cooler, but now there was rain coming.

With a depressing sigh, she shook her head, “I guess I can do it tomorrow?” she muttered drying her hands and made her way out of the kitchen and headed to the closet next.

“Or I could just go anyways?” she wondered, opening the door and seeing the tattered umbrella hanging there that had seen better days.

Its metal pieces were rusted and the thing had been flip inside out to the point it didn’t properly fold back up, and sadly she sold her last umbrella on the premises in her store earlier that day.

She knew she should have taken one from the inventory to avoid having to make a trip to another store.

“I guess it can’t be helped and Sam’s only sells his meat pies today…” Dishearten, wanting to cook a fresh meat pie she closed the door with a heavy moan, she would have to wait for next week then.

Without warning to her surprise, there was a brush of hot air coming from behind her that wasn't right.

She swore she had the windows closed in order for the air conditioner would do its job right.

Then where was the hot air coming from?

_(Huh? That doesn’t make any sense…)_

April turned around to make some sense out of this, that is when she stiffened up, gawking at her window that was fully open and someone stood before it cast in shadows from the bright daylight behind him.

It wasn’t human by far as she recognized the shell shape and body figure as her blood ran cold.

She couldn’t figure out how it could be one of the brothers due to the fact they were bound to the lair at the current moment.

The figure stared at her and she tried to figure out who it was since there was no mask, no gear, nothing to determine the identity of the stranger.

Her lips trembled as she found her voice, “Who is there?”

The figure didn’t answer instead made a step towards her in an eerie silence.

_(I… don’t like where this is going…)_

Her apartment door to her luck was near her and if she planned this out right, she could make it and escape the building, since who knows what mind frame the brother was in and she didn’t want to risk finding out.

The turtle standing there making another step towards her, she bolted to the door with her hand on the handle, only to drop her attempts to flee, when her name was called.

“April…” the male voice that didn’t fit the body, was sad, scared and pleading.

“C… Casey?” April flashed her head towards the turtle, which in that angle she was now able to see him fully other than a silhouette.

_(He can’t be Casey? Could he?)_

The male turtle standing in her living room was definitely not one of the brothers, his skin was a shade between Raph and Donnie, his face was also different and his shell was a darker brown than any of the brother’s shells.

Then to top it off, there were those brown chocolate eyes that were not the same as Donnie’s, that were deeper as Casey’s ever had been.

_(It… is.. how?)_

The turtle she started to believe truly was her ex that was human, gave her a confused and guilty look, looking at his hands then at her.

“Oh god, Casey what… happened?” she turned around to face him, eyes searching within his for an answer.

He shuddered, shaking his head, “I… I don’t know, I woke up like this,” he shook his hands in horror, “Raph…”

“Raph?” April interrupted him.

“Yeah, the bastard came to my place last night…”

“Casey,” April took a step forward in a panic, “You didn’t… I mean you both…” she looked him over again gasping, “You and Raph had intercourse?”

Casey shot her a confused look, unsure where she came to the conclusion so fast regardless it was true. There was something about her posture that rubbed him the wrong way, the way she asked as if there was a secret hidden in her words, a truth she knew that he did not.

He took the chance wanting to know what she knew, for he felt like he was in the dark on this one, “Maybe, why?”

“Oh no…” April choked on her words, covering her mouth and took a step back, “I… we...sorry…”

“Sorry?” Casey growled feeling a heat igniting slowly inside him? “Sorry? Why are you saying sorry?” he demanded with his voice rising.

“Well…” April shuddered as he narrowed his eyes at her, “Please don’t get angry, but we never thought to warn you for what would be the point if the brothers were only looking for a mate.”

The word mate echoed in his head like thunder in his ears, the same word Raph started to refer him to throughout the night! He clenched his fists snarling at her, “Stop beating around the bushes! What is going on? What happened to me!”

Gulping April hesitated, not sure if she should continue, yet was it just as dangerous not to?

Feeling he had the right to know, regardless it would be a shocker, he had to know, “Donnie told me a few years ago in fear of my safety being a female, that the year prior he discovered something disturbing about their mutant bodies. Being the only of their kind and unable to procreate, though they suffer from a mating cycle, their mutation took a turn to fill in that need.”

“What?” Casey blinked in confusion as some of his anger left him.

She tightened her lips continuing, “During their cycle their pre-cum and semen is laced with a mutagen that their bodies produce to change the one they are mating, to breach the difference of species,” she gave him a pity looked before concluding his worst nightmare, “Other words for them to have sex with a human only during their cycle... that human will mutate into a turtle.”

“What! And no one fucken thought to tell me this!” Casey’s rage peaked as his eyes had a deadly glare in them.

“We didn’t for there was more to it that they were embarrassed and felt guilty over!” she told him quickly in defense.

“What, that they mutated people they fuck during their horny period!”

“No, it’s not just that Casey, believe me when I say we never told you for no one considered that you would be a target… No one knew I guess Raph is actually gay…” April paused, she never thought of that as a scenario, nor did anyone thought that would happen, or was it... never wanted to admit it?

_(Did I ever notice… Or was I just ignoring it?)_

“Fuck that April look at me!” he demanded her to look him in the eyes.

“Casey listen. The reason they were unwilling to tell you was that they thought you would despise them for… the deaths that followed the year prior that made Donnie realize what their bodies were doing.”

“Deaths?” Casey cant his head.

“Yes, deaths, the others that they mated all died in the process, each one died from a heart attack or complications caused by the transformation. Donnie was still working on why that was for if the human body can’t take it, why did their bodies create a solution to their problem that only brought death over what their instincts wanted?”

“The others had died…” Casey’s eyes looked back to his hands that clenched and released. He wasn’t dead, he was very well alive then what made him different?

“Yes… They all died… The brothers regret that and live with that guilt… How you survived, I can’t even start to understand, maybe you being male could be a factor or some other reasons…” she explained, happy he did survive the deed, however, to what price?

Casey had grown silent staring at his hands, while April closed her eyes, figuring she explained this far, it was best he heard it all, “Since they fear something will happen again and probably would, this is why Donnie wanted me to know in fear that one of them might target me for convenience. That alone wasn’t enough for my safety and others that could fall victim to their cycle, he created the bracelets to prevent them from leaving the lair, so in order not to have that happen and as well Leo making attempts to try to kill you again. To assure this would work Donnie gave me the controller of the bracelets so no one can turn them off until their cycle was over.”

“What did you just say?” he shot her a look.

“Donnie told me…” she started to repeat, then he threw his hands to the side, growling to her that startled her deeply. His eyes were growing dark and to her horror, they resembled the same dangerous look that Leo had in the past. She felt like she was in danger.

_(Oh no… this doesn’t feel right… something is terribly wrong… I have seen him angry before but this… this feels so wrong! Is he losing himself? He is not affected by the mating season is he?)_

“Not that, after! After!” he demanded, huffing hot air through his nostrils.

“The bracelets?” she took a step back feeling the door against her back.

“You have the controller?” Casey took a step forward, narrowing his eyes at her, nostrils flaring.

“Yes… why…” she shuddered, hand behind her searching for the handle fearing if she dared to turn her back towards him that would be the last thing she does.

_(Oh god... He is! Oh no… I should have left before this! Why didn’t it occur to me he too being a turtle now can fall to their cycle!)_

“He had his off!!!” Casey roared in a pure rage that drowned him, taking over his mind and body, “This is your fault! That is why you broke up with me, to set me up!!!”

“I would never!” April defended herself getting her hand on the handle. He wasn’t in his right mind, she told herself, he was seeing things that were not there and who knows what he would do to her now that he was convinced that she was the reason of his transformation.

“Fucken bitch!” he lost it fully charging her as his eyes were looking for blood, her blood, and he was going to kill her for betraying him, for making him a freak!

_(I have to run!)_

“Casey please stop!!!”

_(Donnie…)_

_(...)_

_(where are you…)_

* * *

 

The fresh smell of blood lingered in the air, making its way into his nostrils as fear took root. Was he here and what did he do?

The satisfaction of that night had cleared his head for the moment and after waking up alone, he worried over the worse not finding his mate at his side.

The transformation fully finished and there seemed to be no side effects, no alarming indication of death to follow, then did Casey leave in his confusion to seek help from the one person he could?

Was that why he was at April’s as he had tracked Casey down to be?

Reaching the stairs to the main floor from the basement not daring to go topside being the middle of the day, he rushed up to them, then stop at the top in pure horror gasping at the scene that was displayed.

Casey, his new mate, was looming over the limp body of April, one of his good friends, who was spread out in an unnatural position at the bottom of her staircase that led to her apartment.

The apartment door was ripped off its hinges and there was blood splattered all over the place from top to bottom. Casey lost in his deep rage, which made Raph unable to recognize him, had his arms locked together over his head and ready to give the final blow to April.

“Casey you have to stop,” Raph yelled out moving forward, witnessing to his dismay Casey not flinching to his voice nor registering it.

The pure alpha scent seeping out of his pores gave him the reality of the situation. His mate will not stop until she was dead and he wouldn't allow that to happen, he couldn’t let it happen if he wanted his mate to live another day fearing his brother would hunt him down.

He had to take action or April would lose her life by that instinctive to dominate or destroy all threats.

He could fight his lover, he could overpower him yet this mating madness consuming Casey deeply being his first, Raph knew in this condition this setting he had no chance to prevent Casey from killing her and could risk Casey seeing him as a threat, not his mate, that is if she wasn’t already dead.

There was little choice at hand, he had to do something that he wished not to do.

_(I have to stop him or… Donnie will kill him or… Leo… and I won’t be able to protect him...)_

“I’m sorry,” Raph said sadly, pulling a small box from his pouch and taking out a syringe, he had it on him to sedate Casey if his change was showing he was going to die to prevent him to go in a stage where he would have a heart attack at least.

Yet that stage never came to pass as Raph distracted Casey from his change so he never noticed until he was fully a turtle and human no more.

Casey’s hand coming down in a fury of animosity towards April, Raph leaped into action jabbing the syringe in his neck and body tackling Casey back into the wall, far away from the helpless human.

Casey seeing Raph for the first time tried to say something, then his eyes rolled up to the top of his head and his body went limp.

Breathing heavily, he removed himself off of him and look at his hands, then tilted his head towards his broken friend.

_(Ah shell, this wasn’t supposed to happen… What did you say to him to make him hate you so much? Was it the breakup or something else?)_

Slowly he approached her placing his hand on her neck for a pulse, there was one and it was faint.

_(Thank the shell she survived this… somehow… man, no wonder he likes her, she is one tough broad no matter how you slice it. She survived an attack from a raging mutant turtle with no broken bones at least I can tell.)_

Rising up, he bit his lip to figure out what he should do, since her victory to live this far could be a shortcoming if he didn’t help her to stay alive.

“Hold on April,” Raph ran up the stairs into her apartment, then abruptly stopped at the threshold, gawking at the mess that revealed the horrors she must have gone through.

The imagery invading his mind, Raph didn't dare to think it any further, he couldn't waste more time, reaching for the phone, “Nine one one, yes there is a woman at the bottom of the stairs, she is breathing but not responding. I’m at…”

When the person on the other line asked him who he was, he hung up, they knew where she was and an ambulance was coming.

Who knew how long that would take but he needed to remove Casey from the premises as well for him.

Rushing down the stairs, he picked up Casey and gave April a sympathetic look, “Sorry I have to leave you alone. You will be okay, they are coming April.”

“D… Donnie…” a faint, weak voice came from her, as his face went grim in guilt for his mate’s actions. He should have known that would be the name she would think of first, regardless he and his brother sounded nothing alike.

“I promise he will see you later,” Raph assured her, unsure if she heard him since she appeared she was still unconscious.

* * *

 

He hovered there at the bottom of the stairs, hiding within the shadows. It didn’t take him long to bring Casey back to his apartment, placing that bracer that was to be his shackles, to prevent the mate from leaving his apartment when he wasn’t supervised.

He would have stayed yet he had to do a few things while his mind was still semi clear and wasn’t invaded by lust and need.

There was talking above from the police and medics as he could hear them wheel April out, they stated she was alive yet in bad condition and they were rushing her to the nearest hospital.

There was talk between the cops over what must have gone down, but nothing could be confirmed since no evidence was pointing to an actual conclusion.

It was an attack as far as they knew. Hearing what he wanted he slipped away to the exit in the basement of the sewers before any of the men in blue got the idea to search the basement. In the safety of the sewers he ran home, he had to talk to one brother or at least inform that brother over what has happened, though he wasn’t sure how that would go.

* * *

 

The journey home uneventful, it wasn’t long before he was in the safety of the lair. Once he had entered closing the exit behind him, Raph cautiously searched about, wanting to avoid the fearless leader, knowing how aggressive he could get and didn’t want to linger here longer than he had to.

He had to get back to his mate before he decided to do renovations to his apartment, mainly trash it more than it was.

There was no sign of Leo or Mikey, as he figured the young brother was either jacking off in his room or the shower, then as for Leo he assumed was in the Dojo to see if he could calm his hormones by means of meditation. Like that worked, Raph scuffed on the idea heading towards the lab where he would find his brainy brother trying desperately to immerse himself into a project to take his mind off of his own needs.

When he entered the lab, he found it in good condition, though that wasn't a surprise since Donnie did take precautions to turtle mating proofing it and to Raph’s relief, his brother was just there sitting at his desk with his head buried in his hands, lost in thought. There were signs of control and that was something Raph was hoping for or this might not bold to well for him.

“Bro,” Raph said gently, seeing an eye peeking out of the cracks between the large thick green fingers. The eye was sparking with frustration and a hint of anger that also linger there, yet not too alarming for him to approach him without getting into some scuff with his brother.

“What do you want?” he asked coldly.

“I’m here to let you know something happened…” Raph started as Donnie only growled.

“Like you finding a way to leave?” he spat at him in disgust. Now was it in anger or jealousy Raph couldn’t tell, brushing it off and cut to the chase, before this escalated and he loses his own composure that will delay his return to Casey.

“That doesn’t matter, it's about April…”

“April!” Donnie shot up whipping his head towards Raph letting out a growl, “You didn’t!” Donnie hissed, then darted out of his chair that circled around by the force.

With only a split moment to react Raph took the attack head on not allowing Donnie to pin him down, instead flipped his brother over him making him land hard on the ground plastron first.

Raph turned towards him smashing his knee down on the shell and grabbed one of Donnie’s arms pulling it back hard. “Chill!” he demanded, letting out his alpha scent making the younger brother whimper.

“I didn’t touch her,” he informed the purple mask brother whose body relaxed by the news, “I went for Casey…”

“Casey?” Donnie blinked finding some clarity in the midst of his anger, “Is he…”

“Alive and healthy, but horny and no control at all.”

“He turned fully without having a heart attack or any other deadly side effects?” Donnie demanded the answer in shock that it was possible after all.

“Yeah, but about April…”

“What about her?” Donnie eagerly asked.

“She is in the hospital bro… she is in bad shape,” Raph told him.

The anger returning to Donnie, he managed to break the hold throwing Raph off of him as he took the turn pouncing on his brother slamming his shell into the concrete floor, “What do you mean she is in the hospital what the hell happened!”

“Casey, he attacked her,” Raph dared to tell the truth fuelling the spark of fire developing in his brother's gut.

“He is dead!” Donnie growled the threat that didn’t bold to well for Raph. The red mask brother thrust his fist forward, catching Donnie in the jaw, knocking him off of him.

“Don’t you dare touch my mate Donnie, he is mine!” Raph proclaimed dangerously warning the younger brother not to dare.

“But he…”

“Was in anger he didn’t mean it, besides, she survived and was alive when she went to the hospital, he didn’t kill her!” Raph defended Casey.

Donnie looked away, wiping the blood from his mouth than almost jumped when something landed on his lap. Looking down, he was surprised to see the small controller, he picked it up and he examined it, then the metal bracelet that was his chain and ball to the lair.

He slowly looked up at Raph whose arms were crossed with a serious look on his face as he stared down at him.

“It’s up to you what you want to do, go see her to make sure she is okay,” Raph suggested as Donnie hesitated for a moment, biting his lip and managing to find his balance once more.

“But what if I do something… I don’t want to hurt her...”

“Pff! Doubt it, no matter how horny you are Donnie you always found some control towards her, besides no one is around to make sure she is safe,” Raph told him, showing how worried he was too of April’s condition, yet had his own problems to deal with.

“Do you…” Donnie bit his lip pressing the button to remove his bracelet seeing it falling to the ground.

“Up to you,” Raph once again just gave a simple answer, yet not any advice, “Oh don’t unlock mine.”

Donnie stood up, tilting his head at his brother, “Why? You're not even wearing it.”

“Nope, but Casey is and if I remember correctly, the fact I put it on his wrist in his apartment it will keep him there?” Raph had to make sure it was correct.

“Yes, for it is designed to measure the area the wearer is in and determine the parameters to their lockdown. Being an apartment it will recognize his front door, windows as a restricted area beyond them.”

“Good I have to go,” Raph turned around to leave, then stopped when Donnie required April’s condition before the ambulance showed up.

He explained the best he could with questions thrown at him and when his brother was satisfied, he started to leave once more, then paused for the last time, “Oh make sure the other two don’t get the remote, we don’t want crazy Leo out on the loose...and good luck bro.”

“Right, that would be disastrous…” Donnie nodded in agreement. Once again alone, with Raph gone probably heading to Casey's, he took a breath building up his courage and confidence. With the controller back in his capable hands and with no one he could trust with it he locked up the remote for safety and then looked about to see if he should take anything with him to the hospital, since who knows how long he will be.

* * *

 

The room beyond the window was quiet. It being the dead of night considering he couldn’t just walk into the building through the front door and the fact daylight would have made it easier for anyone to spot him scaling the side of the hospital to reach the fourth floor, he had little choice to wait until the sun came down.

He slid the window open watching the curtains swaying in the light breeze as he entered the room, heart heavy seeing her lying there with machines surrounding her. There was one that was reading her life signs as another which made him shuddered seeing it, that it too was being used as well.

It was giving April air to breathe, as she was wearing an oxygen mask.

 _(Raph never said it was this bad.)_ Donnie let out a shiver, making his way to her side and placing his hand on her warm cheek.

She had a bandage around her head and stitches on her cheek, he moved his hand down lifting the blanket taking her hand and examining her arm, there were more bandages and bruising on the soft skin.

_(Shit Casey really did a number on you…)_

A helpless whimper came from him wishing he could just make her better, as he dared to look over at her heartbeat that was steady, then back to her, hearing the machine in rhythm providing her air.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you,” he said softly, holding onto her hand that didn’t clench nor move.

Was she asleep or did they give her something to knock her out? Unless she was in a coma?

Placing his head in his hand, he could feel the fires rising in his stomach as he desperately tried to fight it, he wanted someone to pay for this so badly and it was started to way on his best judgment.

He let go of her hand and he rose to his feet, figuring he needed to find out more about her condition, he moved towards the front of the bed hoping there he would find her charts that were a reference for the nurses.

To his dismay, there was nothing there. He didn't give up and went next towards the door that sometimes they leave it there, unfortunately not seeing anything there either, frustrated he looked around in defeat, there was nothing there for him to get some clue what was wrong.

Why was she not responding and why did she require a machine to help her breathe? Yes, Raph did say she was in bad shape, but April was breathing on her own, bruised up and out cold, yet nothing seemed broken so what was wrong with her?

Moving away from the door, he froze when he heard the handle suddenly turn. He panicked for a split second estimating the window was too far of a reach to achieve a safe escape, he made quick action to slip into the bathroom that was next to him and hide in its shadows, just as the door open promptly and a man stepped in wearing a white lab coat.

The man entered, then closed the door behind him, leaving himself what he would assume to be alone with April, not aware Donnie was watching. In his hands was a clipboard and he approached the bed as it took everything inside Donnie not to attack the guy for daring to go near her. He had to take a breath not letting his instincts to protect her overwhelm him since such action would put her in more danger than not.

The man hovered a look over his papers on his board, nodding to himself just as he did so, his phone began to ring. The man that must have been April's assigned doctor started to act suspicious, stiffening up by the call and then flashed a look about as if to make sure no one was around, a behaviour that struck odd to Donnie.

There was a strong aroma of fear mix with anxiety coming now from the doctor. The man finally answered it once he was comfortable he was alone.

“Hello?” the doctor answered. “Yes, I have the individual before me…” the doctor told the other person on the line walking up to April’s side.

He let out a few “Uhh,” confirmations by the sounds of it. The way the man was looking at April made Donnie’s blood run cold and fire burning hot inside, what was this talk about April? “Yes sir, it was successful she should be awake in a couple of days… Yes, I will make sure all traces of that is covered up.”

 _(Covered up?)_ Donnie leaned forward acting like if he did so he would hear the individual on the other line.

“Yes, sir, thank you,” the doctor ended the call letting out a sigh and shaking his head. The man placed the phone away and was about to turn to leave, however, that wasn't in his cards since Donnie wanted answers and he wasn’t going to play a good little ninja in the dark, he was going to get them now!

The man let out a horrified yelp as Donnie charged him and slammed the doctor into the wall covering the human’s mouth before he alarmed the damn building of his presence. The man’s eyes were round as saucers staring at him in disbelief.

“Who were you talking to?” Donnie demanded, lowering his hand that only allowed the doctor to attempt to scream for help. This action annoyed him, forcing him to shut the human up again and growl, having no patience for this fool.

“Let me tell you where you stand Doctor, I will not hesitate to kill you unless you tell me what the fuck is going on? Who were you talking to, what did you do to April?” When April’s name was mentioned the man's fear rose to dangerous heights making Donnie narrow his eyes at him in suspicion.

“What did you do to her? What is wrong with her?” He repeated his question lightly, letting go of the man’s mouth as the words stumbled out.

“I didn’t do anything…” the man pleaded, yet his heart race faster and his skin started to bead sweat revealing he was lying.

Instead of asking what he had done Donnie repeated the other question, “What is wrong with her?”

“She… is in a coma,” the man stuttered, his heartbeat was lowering as Donnie glared at him to continue as the man swallowed the lump in his throat, “She is in critical condition.”

“And?” Donnie asked, knowing that wasn’t all of it, the conversation on the phone indicated there was more.

“She suffers from a spine injury that has paralyzed her... from the neck down,” the man trembled out as Donnie’s heart leaped into his throat.

“She is permanently paralyzed!” he demanded, shaking the man that nodded.

 _(This can’t be… Did Casey... No... what Raph said indicated nothing of the sort!)_ Flashing an angry look at the doctor Donnie growled, “She can’t be!”

“She is…” the man assured him and with his trembling hand raised the clipboard.

“Please just take it, I did nothing, I have kids, I have…” a sharp snap came next as the man fell silent and his body flopped to the ground.

Donnie’s eyes dark and full of rage, looked down at the broken dead man with no remorse as he coldly addressed him, “I know you had something to do with it pathetic human. Be thankful I made that quick and painless.”

Reaching for the board and cell in the doctor's possession, Donnie first looked at the call number that was received, his teeth grind in pure rage.

He recognized the number, it belonged to one of the Foot soldiers, one he has seen in the past, a number that was used to contact employers to do the Foot's bidding.

This doctor worked for the Foot, then was this the order that he was given.

Looking through the charts Donnie gawked in horror it was her test results showing she went to surgery for she had problems breathing and they found out her spine was broken, yet it didn’t add up which came back to what the man said about cleaning up.

He was going to probably make sure nothing traced back that April was in better condition when she was admitted, he assumed. Raph's description of how she moved her hand when he checked on her was proof enough.

“The Foot had this planned out for how long,” his eyes darted towards April, “How long have they had this in effect waiting for you or Casey to come to the hospital and do this to you in order to gain some ground from us? Shell if I wasn’t here I would think Casey was the cause of your injuries, not some setup…”

The fires burning hotter than he could handle, he slapped himself in the face to get a hold of himself.

April was still in danger and being crippled she couldn’t protect herself, who knows how many others in this hospital were working with the Foot.

Dropping the phone and clipboard Donnie got to work.

He couldn't carry her out through the window fearing to further injure her, then he had to leave through the front door somehow.

Gathering her personal effects he placed it on the bed and tried to figure out what next.

First, he had to trick the machine to think they are still reading her and take the other since it was the only thing helping her to breathe.

Luckily it was one of the newer machines that weren’t clunky and awkward, being small and compact that he could place it beside her on the bed.  
  
Suddenly to his dismay, there was commotion outside the room as he darted to the door, opening it ajar to take a peek. _(Shell they couldn't be on to me yet…)_

To his relief, it looked like an ambulance had come in and there were doctors and nurses taking care of the injured that were coming in stretches.

_(What perfect timing! Only in New York.)_

This was his moment to take action, he told himself, turning around getting April prepared.

He removed the IV from her arm and tricked the device that read her life signs.

Once he was done, he scrounged around in his duffle bag, removing a pair of jeans and a hoodie for his own disguise, it was the best he could do and if he was lucky no one would pay him much attention or come close enough to see he wasn't human.

He got dressed quickly, taking a spare blanket and covered April as he took the breaks off the hospital bed.

Donnie then took the doctors key-pass in case he would need it and he moved towards the door looking out before taking his chances.

The hallway was dead and he seized the opportunity quickly making his way to the elevators. Once in, he praised his luck that it was empty and used the key-card he acquired off the doctor and made the elevator to travel to the bottom floor where the parking was located. He did debate another route, however, the security would be too tight around any main entrances, not saying the parking lot wasn't but it would be more lenient for him to escape the grounds with less of a fuss.

The ride slower than he wanted, worrying that soon someone would check on April finding she was gone and the doctor was dead, the doors finally open up to a dark and gloomy basement.

He wheeled the bed forward, eyes searching for the right vehicle to hijack.

All were not fitted for April as he wished he had not this kind of bed, instead of one that was meant to be placed in a vehicle.

Moving forward something caught his eye, a van with a long back that would be perfect with the seats down to place April in, however, there was still the issue of the bed.

He brought her to the vehicle circling around for something to use to keep her flat and stable, yet couldn't see anything. He hissed through his teeth in annoyance, he had gotten this far and his luck was starting to run dry.

Donnie took a long look at her then knew he had to resort to an option he wanted to avoid, with being forced to very carefully laying her on the floor of the vehicle. It wasn't the ideal outcome but it had to do.

_( I have no choice and I'm running out of time…)_

With the back lock as he assumed it wouldn't be that easy, he rushed up towards the driver's door that he had to pick open first and unlock the back from the automatic lock on the inside door. Not wasting more time than he has already, he was able to separate the mattress from the bed using it as her cushioning and placed her in the vehicle.

Once she was secured he hot-wired the vehicle and tossed the bed to the far corner of the parking lot to not make it so obvious.

His heart by now was pounding when he entered the driver's side taking a seat, adjusting his mirror to look at her. She wasn’t moving still only breathing thanks to the machine.

Biting his lip, he focused on getting out of there, “April, I will bring you home, you will be safe I promise… even if I have to lock you up in my lab until the cycle is over… I promise I will protect you... No matter what...”

* * *

 TBC

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes love isn't simple as we wish it to be, is the person you love the one you believe you want to be with or is it the one that you can't stop thinking about? Casey is torn by this, unsure what he wants nor is he sure what he is really thinking and feeling. What is wrong with him? He can't really be into Raph... could he?  
> Disclaimer: The TMNT isn’t mine and this is just a fan fiction writing. No money is being made on this story.  
> Warning: Rape/Non-Con, Sex description/elements, Violence, Gay and so on.  
> Please don't read if you don't like these genres. Thanks.

She laid inches from him, hook up to his monitors and was provided with plenty of oxygen she would need.

He stood there lost in thought, leaned against his desk staring at her and biting his lip in dismay.

Her being injured had placed a damper on his mating needs which was a relief, though that couldn't be said for another, as it was indicated it wasn’t having the same effect on his other brother by the banging on his lab door and the orders that tried to reach his ears from the leader.

Donnie didn't dare to risk it, figuring of such an outcome coming to play. One that Leo would be drawn to her scent and that dwelling fear of what the leader would do to her, Donnie locked the lab’s door, changing all the codes to make sure he wouldn’t gain access to this room.

The annoyance of the older brother eventually simmered down, he didn't bother to check if Leo had finally got the clue to leave her be, knowing it was a possible trap to have his guard down, or giving Leo another reason to keep trying to get in.

The room was silent once more with only the sounds of his machines for company, he was able to think clearly with no air pollution fogging his brain with anger and that primal, dominating thoughts of protecting his territory.

His eyes meticulously studied her still body, unable to see how or believe she would live her life like this, was there anything he could do? One option came to mind yet that was a risk of its own, unless... he found a way it wasn’t?

“It’s a possibility… is it?” he flipped the phone open dialling his hot-headed brother.

When he finally answered on the fifth ring there was frustration in his voice, “What is it?”

“Don’t act like that towards me,” Donnie warned, “Listen, I need to know what you did to Casey in every detail.”

“Shell no!” Raph growled in response, not liking his brother up in his business.

“Too bad Raph, it’s April…”

“So you want to grab some ass too then, is that it?”

“No…” Donnie said in a sad tone, yet part of him did in a way but not like this.

“No? Then why the shell ask me then? You're not going to pull one of those guilt trips or is this another Donnie-boy wants to study shit under a telescope?”

“It’s called a microscope, a telescope is used to view…”

“Don’t care, telescope, microscope same fucken deal.”

“No, it’s not! They are two different things that…”

“Boring got to go…”

“No, wait Raph, I need to know, you see… April is paralyzed from the neck down,” he spat out hearing the other line fall silent yet he could hear his brother shift uncomfortably.

“What do you mean?” Raph finally found his voice.

“The Foot, they had an operative in the hospital that took the opportunity over April’s injuries too…”

“Fuck sakes!” Raph raged and Donnie quickly cut in before his brother was consumed by rage and he wouldn't’ be able to get a word edgewise in.

“Raph that isn’t important right now, what is that I know what you did to weigh the options. I need to know if it is possible to use that as a way to heal her,” Donnie’s voice was desperate and Raph calmed down on the other side of the line.

“Okay, I get it, let's make this quick Casey will be up soon and I’m not sure what kind of mood he will be in.” Raph agreed to tell his brother without sparing any details regardless Donnie appeared to be disturbed over half the information given, regardless, he couldn't spare his brother of such facts since all he knew could be used to help their friend. April was important to him too even if it meant, in the end, his brother wouldn't look at him in the same light over his actions...

* * *

 

A groan came from the other room catching his attention, as he hung up the cell placing it to the side so it didn’t get tossed around later. Raph slowly approached the bedroom looking into the gloom as Casey unsteadily got to his feet, then flop back down onto the bed.

“I wouldn’t move too fast, I had to give you a large dosage,” Raph warned.

Casey sharply looked at him in disgust, “What did you?” he asked then the answers from April bloomed in his head and the anger returned, however so, he didn't recall the details of what he did to her, only remembering the rage he was in and that she was part of the reason he was a freak of nature.

Without warning, Casey charged Raph head-on, making contact to Raph’s plastron. Both came down crashing to the ground, Casey on top of Raph snarling and ready for a fight, then suddenly he froze cheeks turning dark in a blush.

“Like that don’t you, more than to rip my head off?” Raph churred stroking Casey’s tail gently.

“No…” Casey jumped off Raph shaking his head and holding it back, the feelings, the burning desires within.

“Casey you can fight it, however, the more you do, the less control you have. Don’t you want to have some control?” Raph asked, getting to his knees looking up at Casey and slowly approached him not bothering to get to his feet.

Casey looked away in a mix of emotions that he had no way of controlling them, “I… I…”

“Here, let me help you,” Raph offered, reaching the confused turtle, placing his hand back on Casey’s tail, “This is still new to you yet I can tell you really love the feeling, now let's take it a step further,” he told Casey not caring if he protested or not, leaning forward and tilting his head up slightly.

His tongue came out starting at the tip of where the hidden seam was located and travelled up, ending at where the seam ended.

Casey shuddered with teeth chattering, while his eyes stared at Raph and with hands to his side in debate to touch or stop Raph.

A smirk flashed on Raph’s face, as he seductively licked his lip, going back to the first position and repeating the same motion with his tongue, receiving every turn a new reaction from Casey over this new pleasure.

“Raph…” Casey moaned quivering feeling the touch running over his swollen plastron.

“Casey just drop, I promise I will be gentle,” he said slyly, making Casey shudder more, now with the tongue parting the slit and rubbing the head of his member that was still in its pouch.

“I… I don’t know how…” Casey admitted in embarrassment as amusing coo came from Raph.

“Oh is that so, then I guess Casey today’s lesson is to teach you sex turtle style 101,” he gleefully informed him, “Starting with you learning to drop your dick and to do that I will keep licking this spot until you figure out how.”

“W...w...w… What?” Casey yelp shuddering as a ripple of pleasure coursed through his body, yet the wall prevented his dick to emerge was becoming a hindrance making the pressure unbearable to handle. “Oh god, please Raph you have…”

“No begging or I will punish you,” Raph warned, “First punishment,” Raph stopped his licking looking up with an impish glimmer in his golden eyes, “Is this!”

Suddenly, Casey yelp in surprise and mix of pain, having Raph shove his two thick fingers up his ass then finding that pleasure spot he remembered from the other day.

Casey’s breath became heavy and he started to let out a churr that startled him at first yet the pleasure intense with the pain from his dick it faded in the background, from his other noises and grunts that came from him mix with Raph’s.

“Damn it, why won't it come out already!” Casey pleaded only to have Raph punish him more.

“None of that either, how about you don’t talk Casey and focus on me,” Raph commanded him rising up and locking his lips with Casey's, “It’s better than worrying about it and it will come out when its ready,” Raph told him aiming for Casey's neck, breathing hot air on it giving it a long wet lick, “until then I’m going to enjoy torturing you.” he churred.

* * *

 

His hands were folded before him as his eyes never left her innocent face, a hand in his, though he knew she wouldn’t feel it, it was for his comfort only.

It was three days now and if the doctor was correct today she should come out of her coma if that was even accurate. It has been hell and he was lost, confused and fighting the burning desire to do the unthinkable.

“April… please wake up…” Donnie whimpered holding her hand tighter, I would do anything to hear your voice.

“D...d…” a mumbling letter came seeping out of her tight lips.

“April!” Donnie jumped in excitement seeing that her eyes were closed still yet under the eyelids there was movement.

“D...d…” she tried again as he rubbed her hand, recalling that wasn’t doing anything, so instead he placed his hand on her cheek that received a response to his warm skin.

“D…”

“April, just relax I’m here you're safe,” Donnie assured her.

“Don...Donnie…” her voice was weak and flat.

“Yes, it’s me, Donnie. April take it slowly, don’t force yourself, you will only strain yourself,” he told her softly continuing to rub her cheek that slowly pressed into it.

“Cas…”

“He is not here, you're safe,” he repeated the two words, hoping it was sinking in since she did try to get out Casey’s name, it was accompanied with a rise of fear that he could smell being so close to her.

“He…”

“Don’t worry about him, I know what happened, he didn’t mean it April, he is not here I promise you.”

“... I… can’t…” she tried to speak out as Donnie’s heart sank.

“April, it’s okay, you’re safe.”

“I… can’t... feel…” a whimper came from her, “I… can’t… move…”

“April listen to me, you need to open your eyes, can you do that?” he tried desperately to change her focus to one task not the issue at hand.

“I…”

“You can do it, I’m right here,” he encouraged her gently showing his presence by his touch.

Her eyes flutter fighting against them trying to close once again. It was moments after that she finally was able to open them without them closing. Then it took her another moment, staring into his brown eyes before she was able to venture on, looking around, turning her head sluggishly to see her surroundings. Giving her, her space, he stood there patiently as they finally ended at him again.

“Donnie… why…” she tried to ask.

“Save your energy April don’t speak, I will explain why you're here, what happened to Casey and how long you been out,” he told her, explaining how she was in the hospital after being attacked by Casey.

How Casey was with Raph on house arrest in a way, what happened to him messed with his mind as the mating season does to them.

He went as far that he knew she was in danger from the Foot being in the hospital yet didn’t elaborate, fearing what to say about her broken spine, instead, skipping it and going on how long she was out which has been roughly three days altogether.

The information just provided he let her have it sink in as she blinked at him. He could smell the fear wrapping its icy fingers around her throat as she tried to speak once more.

“Donnie…”

“Yes, April?”

“Are you still…” she took a deep breath, as he nodded, knowing the question as her eyes widen in a new terror taking root.

“April, don’t worry, I wouldn’t do anything to you,” he waved his hands before him in defence.

“But… you… can’t…”

“You’re injured April, that alone is a wall from me to lose myself and go for you,” Donnie assured her as some relief reached her face, then it turned grim and fearful once more.

“Don… why… can’t… I…” she tried to breathe and talk, that wasn’t working so well. He figured what the Foot had done, made her rely on a machine to breathe was affecting her ability to speak as well.

“I…” Donnie looked down biting his bottom lip hard.

“D…” there was a whimper that came from her and desperation in that one letter, clutching his heart and pulling his soul down to despair, one that he knew in a moment will consume her.

“April… I have some bad news…”

* * *

 

The cold water running over his skin didn’t wash away the dwelling feelings inside.

He had to tell her he convinced himself.

He had to let her know the truth, what happened to her and her condition, of course, the reaction was heart-wrenching.

She broke down crying asking how, why this had to happen.

In her desperation to find this was some joke, he couldn't satisfy her need for this to not be real.

It killed him to see her like this, lost, hope draining from her life, her sparkling soul becoming dull and broken, a shattered mirror of her former self.

He couldn't take it so in turn, he foolishly jumped in without thinking it through and offered her something, a way out in a way, that only horrified her, turning her sorrows and despair to bitter anger and demanding him to leave her alone.

“Why did I have to spring that question on her like that? Making it seem it was a simple fix… I’m such an idiot,” Donnie mumbled head pressing against the shower wall.

It wasn’t like he said it in a manner that came across perverted or needy. He simply pointed out that if she was to go through mutation by means of him of course, the process of mutation would correct any injuries in a manner of speaking.

Since a turtle’s spine is attached to their shell, her own broken spine would change to resemble a turtle's to a new shell her body will grow, correcting her spine and curing her paralyzation.

Sure the process would require them to have sex while he is in his cycle, but that is a minor detail, something they can resolve later.

Though part of him knew if he went through with this it would force him to see her as a mate, the one he belongs to, even so, he wouldn’t let her know that and would never interfere in the future of any relationships she may indulge in.

Not just that before she bit his head off telling him he was disgusting and she hated him, he did mention that he would reverse the process later for her to be human again minus the broken spine.

Even that didn’t bold to well in his favour.

He did wonder if she didn't believe him since he didn't have a solution of that at the moment, yet he was determined to find one eventually.

Regardless he had good intentions, she didn't see it that way, yet he knew he couldn't blame her with all that just happened to her. Even so, all he wanted to do was prevent her from suffering like this, and besides, if he didn’t take the chance now before mating season was over he wouldn’t have the same chance until next year, forcing her to be trapped in her own body that doesn’t work for such a long period of time.

“I know she didn’t mean those words,” he assured himself, heartbroken of the hateful words she said about him and to him.

He knew she was stressed, confused and in shock to what had happened to her, it wasn’t that easy to grasp and anger was something easy to cling to, then acceptance.

“I should check on her to see if she is hungry or thirsty,” Donnie told himself and pulled himself from his self-pity for being turned down.

The shower off and he was dried up, he entered the silent lair looking about for signs of Leo. For good reason, that is, when he exited the lab earlier the older brother did attempt to slip into the lab that was unsuccessful for Donnie’s quick thinking, warning Leo it wasn’t the time for any shenanigans.

Oddly the leader back down, maybe it was something in Donnie’s voice or posture, regardless, the older brother walked away not ushering a word.

No one in sight Donnie briskly went towards his lab placing his hand on the keypad that had a new code for he didn’t dare let any other brother in, he was about to punch the last number until Mikey’s voice was behind him giving him a fright.

“Bro?” Mikey asked as Donnie whipped around ready to defend his territory, the lab, from any other threats towards April. Yet to his surprise Mikey didn’t seem all too interested to enter his lab or bother challenging him.

“Is she okay?” Mikey asked, biting his lip in concern. In the younger brother's hand was a platter with food and drinks.

“Not really… she… is paralyzed,” Donnie admitted getting a gasp from Mikey that eyes widen with questions.

He shook his head, “I will explain later, right now she comes first.”

“What are you going to do?” Mikey wondered.

“Nothing… I can’t do nothing unless she wants me to…” he fell silent as Mikey only nodded passing the tray off to him.

“If she can eat this, it’s for her. However, if she can’t, I will make anything she wants,” Mikey offered the only thing he could.

“Thanks, Mikey… why aren't you… you know?”

“Nah, I would never want my sister now would I?” Mikey smiled brightly.

“Sister… I guess that makes sense that is what she means to you, doesn't she?” Donnie pointed out.

“Yep,” he nodded and looked around, “You better get inside before Leo emerges from his den he’s been very testy and violent of late.”

“I have noticed,” Donnie sighed, turning around and finishing the code, entering the room as he heard something coming toward the door with lightning speed. He would have reacted, but he heard Mikey interfering with that particular threat as Donnie’s door closed behind locking once more.

“Thanks, Mikey,” Donnie said in his head, looking towards the bed April was on, whose eyes were closed.

He took a heavy breath before approaching her.

“Mikey made you something to eat are you hungry?” he asked cautiously, bringing the tray nearby. She didn’t respond as he placed the tray down and was about to head to his desk.

“Donnie, is there any other way?” April hesitantly asked, having more control of her speech yet the words a bit horsey still.

“I don’t know there is one April, every study on the human spine with such fractures and injury to it as yours those individuals never find a cure for it,” Donnie told her as he turned around to face her.

“April I wouldn’t just offer this to you… over other means... I am concerned and I…”

“You would have had your way with me otherwise, if that was the case,” April understood.

He nodded, “Not that I don't desire you, I do, but I wouldn’t want it that way, never this way.”

“I know,” April sighed, biting her lip for some feeling to prove that she was still alive.

“April?” Donnie asked, not liking the trickle of blood coming from her lips.

“So I have a choice to have sex with you to either to mutate into a turtle and be free from this cage, or… die…”

“No, no, no,” Donnie waved his hand rushing to her.

“What do you mean no? All the others, they died you told me so,” she reminded him of what happened to both Leo and Mikey in the past.

“Yet Casey survived,” he was now the one reminding who attacked her. She was about to say something, then fell silent as she tilted her head at him with a confused expression painted on her face, “Yeah about that how did he?”

“I think Raph figured out the key fact that has been baffling me for these past years.”

“Oh?” she insisted to go on to learn this to weigh her options.

“The other two yes, they were females and Casey is a male, but I don’t think that was the reason. You see the other women were afraid of my brothers were not human and when they were… you know forced into intercourse, the shock of having that happen to them mixed with the horror of their bodies suddenly mutating during it, was too much for them to handle…”

“Causing them to freak out and have heart attacks from pure fear,” April finished his hypothesis as he clicked his fingers together.

“Exactly, also them not wanting to mutate, their human body tried to fight the change, then accepting it, causing stress to their bodies and rising other issues as well. I believe that both Casey and Raph have a thing for each other…” Donnie started to explain then trailed off seeing the hurt in April’s eyes.

“Sorry, April…”

“No…” April whimpered, “Don’t be I… already knew they did too, I fooled myself thinking there was nothing there just my imagination, jealous that they spent so much time together, since he…”

“Always came back to you, in the end, knowing he would be faithful either way.”

“Yes, and part of me always felt awful for it…”

“Is that the reason you decided to break up with him?” Donnie had to ask.

“Unfortunately, yes. At the time I didn't know why I had to but felt it had to happen. Part of me, the part that tried to be silent knew why he was having issues and I was fooling myself to think I could ease him by offering myself to him. I guess I was afraid,” April told him.

“Afraid?” Donnie wanted her to elaborate what she was afraid of, yet she didn’t answer shaking her head at him.

“So what you told me so far, the key fact that prevented the shock of changing from killing Casey, was that they like each other or was it that Casey accepted the change? Then again, was it a mix of both?”

Donnie looked at her wanting to go back to the other subject, however, he knew that boat had sailed and if he didn’t want this one too he had to drop the previous.

“Yes, in both regards in a way. What Raph had informed me during the process, he distracted Casey of the changing, focusing on the deed instead, so his brain didn’t try to panic. For that action to work, there was some form of trust between Casey and Raph...” Donnie trailed off, unsure that was the proper way to say it, was there trust? Didn't his brother practically rape Casey? The other two women were raped too, however, neither knew his brothers before the incident, yet Casey obviously had feelings, which could have made the attraction between them, allowing some trust deep down on Casey's behalf that prevented him from dying. Then after the change, being new, he figured Casey was too drunk with lust to notice until the next morning, which was then he realized his mutation and lost himself attacking...

“Makes sense,” April had to admit, it all did. Biting her lip April eyes locked onto Donnie’s, “However will that work for my case too? I mean Donnie this isn’t something lightly taken and you know I will not take it as such, you're my best friend.”

“You are mine as well and I would go to the end of the world and back for you April,” Donnie approached her placing his hand on her cheek seeing her wanting it to stay there to feel something.

“Donnie…”

“April, I will not do it unless you give me permission, but I will say this,” he leaned over giving her a kiss on the cheek, “I do and always had feelings for you and the strongest is to protect you at all cost.”

“Donnie…”

“April I know this isn't something that we can do and forget about it, it will affect us both, but I'm willing... no, ready to risk having the worst outcome losing you my best friend, just to see you never continue suffering like this... I don't want the Foot to win and you pay the cost of their victory... You deserve more than this... being bedridden like this...”

“Donnie…”

“Yes, April?”

“I accept your proposal, I would like to be your mate for your mating season this year.”

He stiffened up in surprise, eyes searching within hers, as his heart was ready to explode she wanted to be his mate?

Regardless of the fact that it was only to be this mating season, her stating this not only in desperation to get out of her situation of being paralyzed, but it also proved to him that is how much she trusted him.

A trust he never thought she would have for him yet those eyes, those green orbs told it all it wasn't fully desperation, she was agreeing to do this, there's more to it. He wasn't sure what it was exactly or if there were words for it, but never in his life he ever felt this way is he leaned forward and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips.

“I promise I will not let you die April, I can do this,” he assured her.

“I know you wouldn’t,” she nodded, then bit her lip, “so how do we do this… I can’t…”

“I will do the work you don't have to worry about that, but not before prepping you so I don’t cause any further injuries.”

“What would that matter,” she tilted her head the best she could, “I won’t feel it and it would heal during the change…”

“Even so I will know and the thought of that is…”

“Oh… I see, a turn-off,” she understood seeing what kind of turtle Donnie was when it came to having sex, he was gentle in nature like he is over other subjects.

“Yeah... Just give me a sec here, I will get some lube and I’ll get myself ready and…”

“What you're going to just leave me here and get hard before returning?” she asked with disappointment in her voice that caught him off guard.

Nervously, he scratched his chin, “That was the plan, I mean I don’t want to make this awkward,” he insisted, received a raised eyebrow from April.

“For who? You or me?” April asked sternly, making him more nervous.

“Well… umm…”

“Donnie are you embarrassed by me watching?” she asked, then added, “Seeing it?” She figured it was best she asked that as well, wondering if that was the problem and besides, she had a sinking feeling when he returned he would purposely go into her blind spot so she couldn’t see his erection.

Shyly he blushed and looked away, “Well… you're use to human male's members…”

“So? Donnie if I’m willing to have sex with you regardless of the reasoning, I would think you would at least trust me to not judge you and…” she blushed, “see first hand that side of you I… never could…”

Her face beet red and her eyes looked elsewhere as he felt warm in the cheeks too, she really wanted to see him like that, seeing him naked per say. A silence rose between them and Donnie's lips bloomed a smile, moving towards her adjusting her so she was tilted up instead fully laying straight.

“Donnie?” she asked as he brushed her cheek.

“Is your breathing fine?” he asked. He had her set up with only a nose piece, not the original mask she was wearing when she left the hospital, with the tec he had in hand it was just effective, better even.

“Yes, I’m not having any issues.”

“Good,” he nodded, then smiled sweetly to her, “You're right, if we are going to do this, you shouldn’t be the only one exposed, it’s not fair, so first let me show you something.” He turned around moving slightly away from her so she could see the bottom of his shell. He, then, when he knew her eyes were fixated on him, he uncoiled his tail as there was a sound from April that made him cringe at first, then came the response he wasn’t expecting.

“Oh my gosh you have a tail, it’s so cute!” April let out a little school girl squeal, as he turned around blinking at her turning dark red.

“You think… it's cute?” he stuttered and she answered with a nod then calmed down.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to insult…”

“No, no,” he waved his hands, “I wasn’t expecting that you would think it was cute,” he played with the word happy she wasn’t weird out by it, maybe she would accept his turtle member after all.

“Why don’t you ever have it down, and always hiding it? Is it a ninja thing?” she asked, showing a spark of curiosity in her voice, that made him chuckle.

“Sort of, you see our tails are very sensitive when touched, can shoot off breathtaking pleasure and--”

“Unbelievable pain? That is why you need to hide it in battle?” she finished his explanation seeing the spark of joy in his eyes.

“Exactly, to protect ourselves from our enemies from using our most sensitive part of our body against us, we learned to curl our tails under our shell to keep them safe,” he explained.

“So is this equivalent to saying a human male balls? So male turtle metaphorical balls, considering turtles have them inside their bodies, in the matter of having a sensitive spot in your case is the tail?”

He nodded, then thought about it, “As far as I am aware that is the case, it isn’t as if I met a female mutant turtle to discuss such a topic to compare.”

“Until now,” April said to him making him pause for a moment blankly staring at her.

“You're right, but that hasn’t happened yet and all this talking isn’t making that come to pass,” he insisted maybe they should start this, since the thought of her being like this, paralyzed longer was slowly killing him inside. He didn't want to poison this amazing event, that was formed by her proposal to have sex with him and strengthen this unforeseen bond between them over that fact that she still was treating him the same, accepting him as he was.

She was an amazing woman, and he wanted to show her how much he cared for her.

“Yeah, so… where is it? In the tail?” she asked as her eyes searched for an answer.

“Of course you would think that, and I would too if I didn’t know better,” he cheekily told her, loving how she was trying so hard to figure it out.

Coming up to her, he got up on her bed positioning himself on top of her with his knees on either side of her and then he hovered over her stomach so she could see him fully.

He used his knees to hold himself there and didn’t dare sit on her, nor place any weight upon her.

She narrowed her eyes at his smug smile that was hiding his secret.

“Come on Donnie give me a hint,” she insisted oddly having fun with this and he was indulging with this foreplay. This was something Casey would never do with her, be playful only going right into action and it was refreshing.

Donnie placed his chin in his hand, “Let’s see, what should I say that will not give it away?”

“If you say it’s below the belt, it’s game over,” she kid, as he laughed.

“Shell if I was that lazy, I would so agree!” he laughed harder with her joining.

Tears in April’s eyes, Donnie leaned over with the largest grin he ever had on his face for a long time, as he wiped her tears, “Your so beautiful April and I’m not just saying for your stunning appearance, really over your personality. No one would even laugh the way you do facing all this change, I’m so lucky I met such an amazing person like you.”

“You really meant it that you have always liked me,” she asked him, pressing her cheek into his hand.

“Yes, I have... but for that reason, I never told you or dared to act since I have that much respect for you and--”

“You really think I care Donnie?” she snapped at him.

“Huh?” Donnie tilted his head at her sudden burst of anger.

“Donnie, please don’t tell me you never considered to ask me out, over since we are different species?”

“That and we were best friends,” he admitted.

She sighed, understanding the friend part, but not the different species, has he not learned by now that is something she doesn’t see when it comes between her and him and his brothers? She took them in as family as they did the same with her, to her he was no different than any human, in the end, it was the person inside that counted. He as Donnie that was what she saw, not whether he was human or mutant.

“It’s in a hidden pocket, not tucked away like my tail,” he gave her the clue that snapped her from her thoughts, as she tried to comprehend what he told her. She didn’t attempt to give an answer as he repeated again, leaning back so she could see his body.

“Hidden pouch, so it's inside your body then?” she said out loud more to herself than to him. Her mouth moved to say something, then she shut it quickly as if she was second-guessing herself.

“You have an idea?” he asked eagerly.

“No,” she said disappointingly as he opened his mouth to give her an answer or clue she quickly stopped him, “Donnie can you move closer so I can see better? I mean, you're too far.”

“Oh… okay,” he said, scooting forward, then stopped.

She mumbled under her breath, “Closer please.”

He nodded, moving an inch more only for her to grumble annoyingly informing him he was still too far away.

Donnie not sure how close she wanted him to be, by the time he was done, he was so close now that he would be sitting on her chest before her neck.

“April how close do you want me to be? I’m almost on top of your... !” Donnie started to question then shuttered, eyes widen in shock, feeling something warm and wet suddenly ran up his hidden seam.

_(Shell she figured it out!)_ His head tilted down just to catch her do another lick that made his member inside throb with need, as a bulge formed.

She tilted her head up grinning wildly, “I win!”

“When did this become a competition?!” he asked, letting out a moan having her do the action again.

_(Oh shell, oh shell! Should I move back?)_ Seeing that would be the wise thing, he received a growl from her when he made the foolish attempt.

“Donnie I won so you have to stay put,” she purred taking another lick.

“But April it’s kind of big… not saying that as some form of boasting… I… I don’t think you need to see it this close up,” he informed her shuttering when he could feel her tongue entering the seam touching the tip of his member.

_(Shell…)_

“You want me to stop?” she asked raising an eyebrow, “Or you want to get closer so I don’t have to kink my neck to reach it?”

Donnie bit his lip finding himself moving closer as he let out a breath, feeling that tongue again, and the smell from her revealed that she was getting off from this.

Lick after lick he became harder and his legs started to tremble, he was to be having sex with her, not having her tease him with a blowjob that would never be.

“April.”

“Yeah?” April stop for a moment warm in the cheeks looking up at his face that showed how much pleasure he was having.

“I’m… I need to drop,” he informed her.

“Drop?” she wondered what he meant as she noticed the tip was at the threshold and wanting to come out, as she caught on, “then do it, Donnie.”

“Okay, I will move--”

“Don’t you dare,” she growled against it.

“But…”

“Donatello don’t you dare,” she challenged him with her green eyes that made him nod in compliance letting his body relaxed and his member slide out of its pocket.

When it was fully out April’s eyes were unreadable as they study the large throbbing purplish organ. He became nervous, fearing her reaction.

_(Shell, I shouldn't have listened to her, I should have moved away, it's practically in her face, she's probably afraid of it or thinks it's too foreign for her taste!)_ About to move away to execute what he originally was set out to do, he suddenly froze in surprise.

_(Did she…)_ Then there was the feeling again and a moan bubbling with glee from her. His eyes looked down seeing a pleasurable look on her face as she pressed her mouth against his member and licked up it. His body shivered in excitement having her doing such a thing.

“Donnie?” she huffed showing a need in her eyes one he has never seen her before.

“Yes April?” he choked out.

“Can you tilt it down, please. I want to taste it,” she said with a hunger in her voice letting out another moan.

“Are you sure?” he asked as she responded gently biting his dick that sent a rush of pleasure up his body as he quickly put his hand down to tilt the tip, in order for her to be able to place her lips against it.

“April your really liking this?” he had to ask as she gently kissed the flower tip before using her tongue to explore the pedals.

“Yeah I am, I mean I can’t feel anything else, so I wanted to do something I can feel and… you being this close to me... you smell… amazing...” her cheeks became redder and he could feel the heat from them, “it’s making me feel so good, I want more.”

_(Smell? Feeling good?)_ He studied her biting his lip at over how good this felt, wanting to clearly think over that statement to understand before losing himself in her aroma and efforts.

Then it hit him, his pheromones must be turning her on. At that moment something flashback to him, making all the pieces to the puzzle he has been desperately trying to figure out, slowly pieced together.

His brothers stated in the past experiences, the women complained over a pungent smell around them, in his case April was relishing in it, so did Casey too with Raph?

Was that part of the acceptance?

Was that part of why Casey survived? Then, if that was the case he had to let April indulge this, accept it mind, body and soul. For her not waiting for that conclusion from him she went to action as he let out a churr feeling her mouth now surrounding his tip sucking on it.

He threw his head back experiencing his first blowjob, churring and holding the railing of the bed. The more she sucked on him the hunger inside grew, the instinct to claim her as his own.

_(Oh shell, where did she learn this from? It feels so good!)_

Moans on the receiving side, April was enjoying herself pushing her limits placing more of his dick in her mouth and a few times deep throat him, that she oddly could handle.

For some reason, though she didn't put much thought on why, instead focused on pleasuring him and bathed in his reactions, which spark a flame making her warm inside, her breathing that was harder to manage before started to become easier the longer she sucked on him.

The bonus, she had to admit was the taste of his pre-cum, it made her want more and then there was his churrs that gave her butterflies in her stomach, wanting him to be louder showing her how much he was enjoying her deed. She has forgotten how it felt when her partner was truly enjoying her efforts and desire to please.

“April!” suddenly Donnie panicked, as April stopped abruptly fearing she did something wrong.

“What is the matter, Donnie? I didn’t bite you too hard did I?” she asked fearfully scared that her teeth had rubbed too hard against his member, making the pleasure a painful experience.

“No… it’s not that I’m... shit April!” Donnie's eyes widen as she just lunged onto his dick. She knew she did nothing wrong and refused him to stop her when he was so close over whatever silly excuse he had.

She sucked harder and used her tongue to vibrate it to make him groan louder.

“April... I’m going to…” as if that was just a password she deep throat him once again vibrating it at the same time. Riding the unbelievable pleasure, unable to complain or protest being too close, to dare make her stop, he couldn’t fathom how she was able to withstand so much of his member in her mouth as she was doing. Lost to him, he pushed it to the side as he snapped his head back, clenching the bed frame as his body trembled.

“OH SHELLL! APRIL!!” Donnie let out an animalistic churr letting go of his holding back of his orgasm and feeling himself released inside her throat.

She didn’t back away, nor showed any discomfort instead started to suck more as if she was drinking from him.

This driving him nuts he had no choice but to pull out hearing her grunt in protest, as he quickly leaned down before she could tell him off for doing that without warning her. He pressed his lips against hers, kissing her deeply churring and slid his body down readying himself to enter her.

His hand searching where her vagina should have been, yet to his surprise, he found nothing there, as a notion came to pass. Until that moment he didn’t realize that she was mutating already.

Even though she consumed his cum instead injecting it through the means of sex, it was having the same effect.

“Donnie, I wasn’t!” April started to complain, then she screamed in half pleasure and surprise as she jerked, and Donnie felt that body spasm that before she couldn't achieve.

“Well now… so that is where it is” Donnie smiled, pressing his member to her newly formed turtle vagina, located under near her new mutated tail, “I guess we just discovered if female turtle’s tails are just as sensitive,” he churred stroking the tail once again sending her in a frenzy of ecstasy, before thrusting his member in her that shocked her body and made her scream for him to give her more.

He had her where he wanted her to be and the longer he mated with her the more it was proven that his theory was right, her body's new change was making her mobile once again, and with that he found himself making breathtaking love with her. April clung onto his shell, letting out sounds of her own while basking in the euphoria, as for the big finale when he was done emptying all the seaman he had in him inside her, he laid his sights upon the most beautiful mutant turtle he ever thought could exist.

“April... I love you,” he said sweetly kissing her on the lips, sweat drenching on his skin that mixed with hers, creating an intoxicating aroma for both to indulge, “and I never want to let you go.”

 

* * *

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes love isn't simple as we wish it to be, is the person you love the one you believe you want to be with or is it the one that you can't stop thinking about? Casey is torn by this, unsure what he wants nor is he sure what he is really thinking and feeling. What is wrong with him? He can't really be into Raph... could he?  
> Disclaimer: The TMNT isn’t mine and this is just a fan fiction writing. No money is being made on this story.  
> Warning: Rape/Non-Con, Sex description/elements, Violence, Gay and so on.  
> Please don't read if you don't like these genres. Thanks.

Her hand trailed over her green skin, feeling the impressions of the semi-rough surface under her fingertips, as the sensation to be able to feel her own touch was overwhelming. A relief over not to be cursed with being paralyzed for the rest of her life, though being stuck in this form was another question for another day.  
  
Her finger continued, trailed down next the red and yellow markings on her legs.  
  
She recalled Donnie questioning why she had them, but that week's roller-coaster ride was a wet dream of events, feelings and a moment of her life where she was someone she never thought existed.  
  
Not the human April O’Neil, she grew up to be, though... was that really who she was or someone she made herself to be driven by these new instincts?  
  
That week she was April, a mutant turtle, the mate to her best friend that open her world to a variety of new hues and wonders.  
  
It wasn’t just the sex that made her question herself, it was him, how he treated her, how he made her feel inside as a person, as a lover, as someone that was on the same level to him and mattered.  
  
Never once before she had this happen to her, not with Casey, not with anyone she had dated or associated with.  
  
That week opened her eyes to make her ponder over if the life she was living the one she truly desired? Then again, was she truly inside human… or a turtle waiting for something like this bring that forth?  
  
“You're beautiful,” the soft voice of Donnie came from her right.  
  
He laid there in their makeshift bed of pillows and sheets, figuring after her mutation, she was best to stay in the lab until the mating season was over.  
  
“Umm.. thanks…” April blushed and placed her hand up to her head in habit to tug her hair in embarrassment, yet drew her hand away recalling she had none.  
  
It all fell out when she changed, something that Donnie made sure she didn’t take any noticed when they were making love.  
  
He took care of her when she was so vulnerable making sure the experience wasn’t overwhelming and she had to admit embarrassingly how she never moaned so much as she did for her first time as a turtle.  
  
A light chuckle came from him as he smiled sweetly at her, “That little habit will not work so well, however,” he paused, grinning ear to ear, “I can always go find a wig for you if you feel--”  
  
“Oh god no!” she flashed him a nasty look for even consider to offer that.

With the expression on her face too much for him to handle, he burst into laughter.  
  
“Fine, I understand,” he snickered, then looked around the lab letting out a sigh, there was much-required cleaning to be done over their week of fun.  
  
Refocusing on her, he sat upon his knees, placing a hand on her shoulder only, nothing too romantic since the mating season was over and he didn’t want to step over his boundaries.  
  
“April I know you are slowly catching up to what is going on with your body and your situation, with the fog of mating clearing or cleared. Even so, I want you to know this doesn’t change us, well for me that is and I am still going to find a way to reverse this without the side effect of you losing your ability to move again.”  
  
April nodded and eyes fell to her hands, three fingers seemed so odd when you were the one with them. With a moment to think she looked up at him, “Nothing changed, you're still my best friend who I recalled said you would do anything to protect me, I appreciate you giving me this chance to not be caged up in my own body.”  
  
“You're welcome April.”  
  
“Donnie?” April bit her lip not looking directly in his eyes, when he answered ‘yes’ she continued, “I think I’m best to leave.”  
  
“Do you want me to help you home then…”  
  
She shook her head, “No, not what I meant by I want to leave... I'm referring to the city, I want to be far away from here…”  
  
“Oh…” he said hastily, feeling his heart throb in pain from her stating that, he wasn't expecting she wanted to leave New York... leave him behind... not after what conspired between each other. Even so, he in truth couldn't blame her, it wasn't like it was fully her choice, being that she had not that much of one.  
  
April took notice of the hurt in his eyes and knew he took it the wrong way, “away from Casey…” she quickly added in as he blinked at her for a moment registering the reason, then nodded quickly feeling foolish to consider he was the reason she wanted to leave.  
  
“Oh!” he got to his feet, “Are you considering the farm then?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Then can I offer to drive you there so…” Donnie started then was interrupted by April.  
  
“Of course, I was hoping you would since I don’t know if I can drive right now without fearing someone noticing me,” she stated as he brightened up.  
  
“Okay, how about you go home through the sewer passage and grab what you need--”  
  
“Can… you go…” April asked hesitantly, as her scent of fear crossed his nostrils and she displayed concern over her own safety by holding her sides.  
  
“Oh… sorry, I never thought of it,” he sighed, seeing she didn’t want to even go home, probably fearing to re-live the last horrifying events with Casey by seeing the evidence left behind that for sure wasn't cleaned up.  
  
Kneeling down to her and placing his hand once again on her shoulder, he squeezed it gently, “What do you need from your apartment? I will go ask Mikey to gather your items as I make preparations to leave for the farm right away.”  
  
She smiled in thanks as she gave him a small list of items, she wanted mostly food she had that she could use and a few large clothing she had in her storefront that she believed would fit her and the odds and ends.  
  
The list memorized Donnie rushed out of the room, leaving this time the door unlocked, with the cycle done she wasn’t going to be a target, yet how were the other brothers going to react to her now being a turtle? Did they even know?  
  
Alone she looked around filled with the scents of their fun that brought her down to memory lane, that imagery was suddenly shattered when something new came to her nostrils. Her head turned towards the new smell seeing the eldest brother standing there studying her and the messy lab.  
  
“I see you two had much fun, though I am still a bit confused on how this came to be,” Leo took a step forward, eyes still scanning.  
  
“Hi, Leo…” April said in embarrassment, he had to be able to smell what she was and knew most of the story by that alone.  
  
“Hello, April,” he acknowledged it was her, “I’m surprised that you would agree to this and survive, I guess Donnie figured out how it can be achieved?”  
  
“Sort of,” she stood up, brushing herself off feeling Leo’s eyes examining her in more detail, it was odd having him do that, having him checking her out. She knew his eyes were looking in spots in the past he would never dare look at yet now it seemed he was more willing, or was it he found it now appropriate since they were the same species?  
  
“Sort of?” he questioned.  
  
Taking a breath, she figured she would have to tell the whole story, someone would have to, though she only told him what she knew as a frown washed over his face.  
  
“I see, so it started with Casey being claimed by Raph, though, as you said, you have no idea how that came to be? Correct? Then after that Casey probably affected by the mating season, lost his temper towards you and hurt you, as you ended up in the hospital. Which at that moment is when the Foot implemented a plausible plan of attack on our clan through either you or Casey, which you, in turn, was the target with the given conditions for that plan to be executed..,” there was a rush of anger in his voice as he continued, moreover the Foot's actions, “crippling you in the process to accumulate a direct blow to us… Then in the end, in order for Donnie to prevent you from suffering in the conditions inflicted from our enemy, he claimed you for mating season. I believe I got that right?” he asked, highlighting the main facts of her story.  
  
“Yeah, I don’t know how long the Foot has been waiting for that opportunity for either me or Casey showing up in the hospital, but the fact they acted so quickly proves it has been there for some time…” April held her arm never thinking the Foot were waiting for her to strike her down in such a manner, which brought a fear inside her that she never consider was there until now once the threat was out in the open.

  
“April, if you think the Foot will have another chance to do anything to you I promise I will not allow it,” Leo assured her placing his hand on hers that was holding her arm.  
  
“Thanks, Leo… Right now I…”  
  
“Want to go to the farm, Donnie has informed me and I think right now you should. I prefer that you were not in town when I bring this little matter up with Karai, she will wish her superiors didn’t dream up such a dishonourable attack on this family, especially with the truce we have.”  
  
“Leo?” April flashed him a look of worry, in return, his eyes that were cold, turned warm as he gave her a smile.  
  
“Don’t worry April, I will not endanger myself or further this family.”  
  
“But…”  
  
“It’s okay April. Please don't take this offensively, but why don’t you go take a shower, you strongly smell like Donnie in many ways... and by then my brothers will be done with their tasks when you're done. Leave the Foot in Michelangelo's and my capable hands.” he insisted, leading her towards the exit of the lab.  
  
She looked away, feeling this was her fault, the guilt was heavy and she didn’t want to put any of them in danger.  
  
“April please I want you to sort yourself out don’t worry about the Foot, us and especially Casey. I will have a talk with him and Raph as well later to sort things on that end, you need to relax and figure out what you want to do from here on out.”  
  
“Figure things out…”  
  
“Yes…” he nodded, “I know Donnie must have promised he will change you back, but… do you really want to?”  
  
“What?” April tilted her head at him receiving no explanation for his question as if he knew something she did not.

He only left it there, leaving her stand there outside the lab with his shell towards her.

Biting her lip, she looked at her hands once more and then towards the direction of the bathrooms.  
  
What did she want?  
  
She really didn't know, it was confusing and the feelings inside were scrambled around not helping.

One feeling that lingered there, the one that she could never forget was those three words... what Donnie admitted to her, that he loved her...  
  


* * *

  
  
The cold water trickling down his body, with shivers invading him, he didn’t care, staring angrily towards the tile wall.  
  
Why did this happen? How did this happen?  
  
This was so fucken messed up!  
  
He grabbed his head, shaking it as if that would put the pieces of his questions together revealing the truth, yet did he really wanted it?  
  
Every part of this was wrong, from his hands to his foreign body, to 'him'… to that damn so-called friend that took advantage of him and the worst part during that heat he was in, the desire of overwhelming lust, he disgustingly enjoyed it all.  
  
What was wrong with him? The crack of ceramic echoed in the small closed room when his fist slammed into the wall before a low growl that bellowed out of him.  
  
The anger and confusion consuming him still, he turned off the water, stepping out and wrapping a towel around him, to only grumble under his breath all the moreover how it didn’t cover him as before because of this shell of his.  
  
His eyes drifted towards the mirror that hung over the sink that was shattered into a thousand pieces from his burst of anger before the shower, the reason he had to take one to cool down before he wrecked the place and feel stupid over it later and also to rinse his bloody knuckles.  
  
They were still stinging and unfortunately starting to bleed once more since he was a moron and used that exact same hand to punch the wall. With that idiotic action, he only achieved to fuel his anger and reopen the final clotted wound. The only option to stop him from painting his bathroom in his own blood, he opened up the medicine cabinet grabbing a roll of gauze to wrap it up.  
  
There were a few mumbled and grumbles playing at the edge of his tongue when he shut the cabinet only to notice the bathroom door was wide open after he knew he had it closed and to his displeasure, there was a figure standing there.  
  
He didn’t have to look over to know who it was for that scent that he was not used to identifying someone with, was potent in his nostrils making him huff loudly opening the gauze ignoring him.  
  
The turtle stood there in silence for what reason Casey didn’t give a damn wanting him to get the clue to leave him alone. However, that wasn’t going to happen to his dismay, as the turtle dare to speak to him, “Casey…”  
  
“Drop it, Raphael,” Casey growled tugging forcefully at the wrapped-up gauze that suddenly slipped from his three freakish fingers to the ground as his anger only rose in frustration.  
  
“But…” Raph started to yet shut his mouth when Casey darted him a dangerous warning that if he wanted to keep that mouth of his it better stay shut.  
  
“Fuck off Raph, get out of my damn apartment, you fucken asshole!” Casey spewed in animosity, focusing back to the gauze and picking it up.  
  
When he rose back up to wrap his hand, the space at the door was empty.  
  
Alone at last Casey let out a sigh, with mix feeling swelling deep inside him, he had no idea what to do anymore.  
  
Should he kill Raphael for what he did to him, well not actually kill him but bring him close to death by beating the shit out of him, or simply ignore him and cut him out of his life?  
  
Then there was the last option, forgive him knowing and understanding first hand how the mating season can mess with someone's head? He knew all too well since he… he attacked April.  
  
“Damn… April…” Casey whimpered in guilt bending over towards the sink, staring inside it that was cluttered with broken glass and blood.  
  
How could he do that to her? He almost killed her and at the time he wanted nothing more than snuff her life out, yet he still loved her, care about her, regarding her as family.  
  
“It’s not always easy to face the guilt of your actions and come to terms with them. Yes, they were yours, but the same time not, just instincts that corrupt your actions, taking away your voice of reason to act them out,” A voice gave advice to him from the door.  
  
Casey jerked up quickly flashing a look in Leo’s direction in surprise, not expecting him to show up and oddly, he didn’t appear one bit surprised over the state he was in.  
  
“Leo?” Casey choked out.  
  
“Casey, I don’t know what exactly has occurred here between you and Raph, but I have my suspicions with the condition of your apartment and April’s story--”  
  
“Is she okay?” Casey jumped in, eyes widen begging Leo to tell him right away.  
  
With a sigh and hands out, gesturing Casey was best to calm down waving them up and down, he waited until the friend did so before answering, “She is and before you run off thinking you should go apologize she has already left town.”  
  
“She has?” Casey asked, relieved to hear she was well, yet fearful of why she left, “It’s because of me isn’t it?”  
  
Leo crossed his arms nodding yet added, “For that yes, but she wanted some time to think as well. I don’t believe she fully blames you Casey yet the same time she can’t face you right now after what you had done, regardless you were not fully yourself.”  
  
“Yeah…” Casey turned away from Leo looking back at the sink, “Leo how did you get over it? I mean you didn’t actually kill me, but you did…”  
  
“Hmmm, good question” Leo took a deep breath, “I guess it started with me thinking over my actions, searching in the depths of them if whether or not those actions were fully my will, or were fuelled by something else, making me wish to bring you harm.”  
  
Casey looked at him sideways with a confused expression on his face, “Huh?”  
  
“Nothing Casey, the point is I discovered that I had no ill feelings towards you other than the fact you were another male, and I know deep down I would have done it to anyone else for that reason alone as well. The question you should be asking yourself is what triggered you to attack her? Was it really because you hate her? Or was it something else?”  
  
“I… I don’t hate her Leo…”  
  
“But before that event, things happened that I believe influence that anger so now you have to figure out was that your true self, or the madness of the mating season?”  
  
Casey taking a step back, blinked wildly at the turtle, never hearing that term before that made his blood run cold over the idea, while Leo scratched his cheek in embarrassment, “That is what Mikey called it, where an individual no matter of the reason will become rash, and unpredictable, violent even, doing acts they would never do since they see the world as an enemy or obstacle they need to eliminate to find the final goal, a mate,” he explained as Casey felt Leo was talking from experience.  
  
“I thought that explains your whole mating season,” Casey pointed out.  
  
“No, not necessarily, Donnie and Mikey have better control, then say,” Leo coughed, “than me for example, Donnie finds ways to distract himself, though it does take more effort on his part. Mikey, I’m not sure how he does it, but he has more sense than any of us.”  
  
“I… see…” Casey mumbled, now part of the crew of the messed up, only recruiting once a damn year.  
  
“Casey, I know you might not want to talk about what happened with Raph at this moment, but I want you to know if you need to talk I’m willing to listen without judgment,” Leo offered as Casey could only nod.  
  
Casey's eyes felt heavy and he could feel the drain from everything gnawing at him as he slumped down on the toilet seat staring at the floor.  
  
Understanding Casey wanted to be alone with his thoughts Leo slipped away, leaving the new turtle alone.  
  
There were so many things Casey had to question, figure out and sort out. Where does he start?  
  
“Maybe April had the right idea,” he told himself calmly finishing up this hand and grabbing a few things from the cabinet.  
  
He was best to get what he needed, find some clothes that would cover him up the best they could and then, he was too best to leave, not the farm, of course, then where?  
  
Deep down to him it didn’t matter as long it was far away from here, since if he stayed he would never get this resolved feeling claustrophobic, knowing out there Raph could be watching him, he can’t face him… Not right now at least…

 

* * *

  
  
The dust from his boots mucked up the clean floor of the elevator as his eyes locked on the doors, feeling it going down yet not opening just yet.  
  
It was probably due to the fact he had his hand on the button, preventing it, feeling the butterflies in his stomach.

It should be simple and shouldn't be this nerve-wracking, yet his palms were sweaty and if it wasn’t for the layers of clothing, his body would have glistened as well.  
  
He was nervous and it killed him inside, he was prepared for this day, he has been working out every possibility on how it could come down to.  
  
He had even gone as far playing this event in his head to every detail yet here at the moment the past six months of preparation went out the window and he was lost.  
  
How could it come to this when he had so much time to think, to sort things out and now his mind was all jumbled up, thoughts, conversations were tripping over each other in a mass heap in his head.  
  
“Take a breath,” he told himself as he hesitantly took his hand off the button, allowing the doors to open revealing the lair before him. It took all his courage to step over the threshold and it wasn’t easy by far.  
  
Anticipating for some bomb to go off, none did as he let out a sigh of relief, it wasn’t lively in the lair, not a soul in sight actually.  
  
Quiet, too quiet for his liking really.  
  
With searching eyes, he scanned for any sign of life only seeing a sliver of light peeking through the ajar door of Donnie’s lab.  
  
He bit his lip unsure if he should start there, either Donnie was alone, the rest of the family was with him or then the last option April.  
  
He felt a bit warm around the collar as he made his way towards the door suddenly freezing seeing it open and someone he didn’t recognize exiting the room not facing him yet, she was facing towards who else was in the room with her.  
  
“I will be right back,” she said sending a cold shiver down his spine recognizing the voice that didn’t match up to how she was before.  
  
April turned then jumped, startled in seeing him as both stared at each other for a moment as Donnie who heard April’s alarming squeak, was at the door in a flash blinking at him too.  
  
It was April that spoken first, knowing Donnie had an idea who it might be, yet of course by the look in Donnie’s eyes he wasn’t taking a chance. “Casey?”  
  
“April…” Casey choked out as Donnie relaxed his hand that was ready to grab his bo staff if needed.  
  
“Yeah, it’s me…”  
  
“How? When? Why?” Casey rambled out in a cloud of confusion as April shifted her feet.  
  
“That is a long story… As I heard yours was as equally long,” April pointed out as Casey’s face turned white in fear how much she knew what happened six months ago. Though he wasn’t sure if he was more fearful about her knowing what happened or she hated him for what he did, was that why she was a turtle now? Did he do something?  
  
“Casey why don’t we talk in private,” April insisted feeling Donnie’s disapproval of that action. She looked over her shoulder, smiling to the purple mask turtle sweetly, “Don’t worry Donnie we will be in the Dojo, no one is home anyways and me and Casey have a lot to talk about and…”  
  
“I.. I understand April,” Donnie answered reluctantly giving one good look over towards Casey and then turned towards his lab door disappearing inside.  
  
“Well?” April turned to Casey seeing how nervous he was.  
  
“Yeah, we need to do this…” he finally answered her.  
  


* * *

  
  
“Jeez April for a second I thought you were paralyzed because of me,” Casey leaned forward almost throwing up on the idea, it was too horrifying to consider.  
  
“Casey I said it wasn’t because of you really, but the Foot's doing, as Leo had confirmed when he met with Karai. There was a faction in the Foot, not governed by Karai or the treaty, who were awaiting for the opportunity for either you or me to end up in the hospital under a strict condition to play this out without suspicion,” April explained, “However, the doctor made a mistake not realizing Donnie was there to check on me and that spilled out the Foot's plans that was to use that tragedy against our family. That said they were taken care of to keep the treaty alive Karai executed all that was involved to gain favour with Leo.”  
  
“Damn,” Casey rubbed his hand over his head, “One fucken thing after another isn’t it…”  
  
April only shrugged leaning back against the wall as she sat on the floor with Casey beside her, “Isn’t that how it always has been?”  
  
A sigh came from him as he tilted his head at her, “Yeah, it has, but it really went chaotic this time around April, look at us.”  
  
“I know, but I prefer this than being stuck in my body unable to move ever again,” April said with a shiver, used to her body by now, “But what about you Casey? I mean, how are you dealing with you being like this?”  
  
He shrugged, “It has grown on me, not that I have a choice, “ he smacked his shell against the wall hearing the sound yet not feeling it like he would with a human back.  
  
“I see…”  
  
“April,” Casey bit his lip, looking at his hands in guilt, “Do you hate me?”  
  
“For what you have done?” April asked, to get him to elaborate to make sure they were both on the same page, he nodded. “No, but…” his head tilted towards her with a hint of fear as she smiled, “it will take time for me to trust you, right now I’m only alone with you for I know Donnie is in earshot.”  
  
“Oh… I understand,” Casey sighed, looking back at his hand growing silent for a moment before bringing up what happened that day, “April, I'm just saying this for I need to tell you, but it doesn’t mean I’m doing so to change your mind, if you want to take your time to trust me again, I will not hold it against you, you deserve that right to not to trust me. But, what I did that day I had no control, it was nothing I have ever experienced, I was so angry at him, angry and afraid of what happened to me then when I found out you knew about this messed up thing the guys can do, I lost it. I lost it for the person I loved telling me they couldn’t be with me withheld information that could have prevented this mutation…”  
  
“Casey I didn’t hold it back for--” April started aggressively to defend her past actions.  
  
“April, let me finish, please,” he begged her as she fell silent, staring at him, “Yes at the time I blamed you though part of me understood why you never told me since who would have thought this would happen, or it would work on a male as much a female. All reasoning washed away from that moment. It wasn’t until I cleared my head after I left I came to terms, it was my fault you never told me, it was my fault never seeing the signs.”  
  
“Casey?”  
  
“April we were drifting apart, we were not talking anymore I came and fucked and fucked off. There was nothing between us and yet I still acted like there was as you did the same. I’m sorry April for attacking you as I did for I know more than anything the reason I attacked you was I was angry at myself for almost losing you.”  
  
“Casey… I’m sorry, but we….”  
  
“Are over yes, but I still want to be in your life April as your friend again, going back to the same relationship we had before ever thinking of hooking up. At that moment I thought even that was lost, and never can be... I didn't want to be alone again, losing one of my best friends, you...”  
  
“I see,” April chuckled, “Yeah, we messed this up a bit didn’t we, I guess that makes sense why I never said anything since we never had a moment to talk about things.”  
  
Casey nodded, “Worse, we… well, I... used the guys for my excuse to try fixing a relationship that wasn’t there anymore.”  
  
“You did?” April tilted her head at him.  
  
“I know this is stupid, I thought if we broke up things will change, like not hanging out with the guys for I fear you would hate me and I would have to back off to not upset you since they were your friends first.”  
  
“Casey…”  
  
“April it’s true… I had it in my head the awkwardness would tear everything apart.”  
  
“I felt the same,” April admitted shocking him.  
  
“Really?” Casey turned his head at her in surprise.  
  
“Really, I had it in my head if we broke up something bad will happen poisoning our relationship with the guys, more so when I realized that you might have feelings for Raphael…”  
  
“What?!” Casey almost jumped away from her, “How…”  
  
“So I was right you did,” she leaned over pointing her finger in his face as he nervously looked away.  
  
“Maybe…”  
  
“Casey Jones don’t hold back,” she grumbled as he chuckled under his breath.  
  
“It’s complicated,” he admitted, “but I did and the same time I still had strong feelings for you, so I had no idea what to do, nor was able to admit it to myself. Fuck I was so confused that I had no idea how to feel nor understood what I was feeling either, it was too much for me to handle and I felt alone on it, unable to talk to anyone about it bottling up thinking the cure was running to you all the time for a quick fix...”  
  
“I can see that,” she nodded.  
  
“So April how are you doing?” Casey changed the subject as she smiled at him and smack her lips together.  
  
“Well…” she bit her lip next as he stared at her, “I… am pregnant…”  
  
“You're what!” Casey stared at her shell shock, “With who! How… when…”  
  
“Casey,” April motion her hands, “Calm down and no it wasn’t with you, remember I couldn’t have kids right?”  
  
“Hell, I know that, that is why I said how?” Casey's mouth moved a mile a minute.  
  
“The mutation corrected that little problem and who well…” she turned her head looking away.  
  
“Oh, shit really! Donnie?” Casey guessed as her face turned fully red, “Ah man, no wonder he was acting so protective over you. Let me guess, it happened during the mating season?”  
  
“Actually at the farm when Donnie and I stayed there for a month,” April admitted.  
  
Casey let out a bark of a laugh, “Well then I’m happy that your happy April, I can see it on your face, and I guess congratulations is in order?”  
  
“I am happy too Casey, no offence, compare to before when we were together.”  
  
“None taken, how many, so do you guys know if it is a girl or boy?” Casey spat out questions, then paused, trying to comprehend how mutant turtles have children, “How does this even work?”

  
“Casey,” April chuckled, “How about you talk to Donnie about that,” she insisted as they heard a moan in the distance as they both rolled their eyes.  
  
“You were not kidding that he was in earshot April,” Casey sighed rising to his feet, giving a hand to April to help her up. She hesitated for a moment, then took it, letting him to prove himself, one step at a time she told herself.  
  
“Well, I’ll ask later I need to find him first,” Casey sighed.  
  
“Raphael?”  
  
“Yeah,” Casey reluctantly admitted, “I have a score to settle with him.”  
  
“Oh…” April only could say as he started to walk out of the Dojo seeing that Donnie was at the entrance against the wall. He paid him no attention on his mission to find Raph.  
  
“You're not going to kill him are you?” Donnie asked seriously, showing he knew more than April did at least.  
  
“Can’t make any promises Donnie-boy,” Casey called over his shoulder, “Is it okay, I leave my stuff here I will pick it up later.”  
  
“Sure, it's the best way to make sure you come back and I..”  
  
“Miss you too dork, I have a feeling Leo wants to talk later too when he is home?” Casey asked hearing Donnie give him a yes in more a grunt as he headed for the elevator. He figured that would be the case too, but first, he needed to find him. Casey clenched his fist tightly on the thought over the one he needed to face and get some damn answer out of, answers that have been eating him alive. The one that took advantage of him, he would have to pay for this one way or another!  
  


* * *

  
  
The sky was brighter than most nights, the stars fought the light pollution showing him a spectacular display, yet it felt empty, a trick, since the only thing that was there was this void and it couldn’t be filled.  
  
These days it took every effort of his being to even get out of bed, unable to see why he should or put any effort to do so. He lost everything and nothing was what greeted him every given day.  
  
It grew stronger and the regret clawed down into his soul and flesh, so deeply he wouldn’t be surprised it was nothing more than a husk, a broken memory of who he once was.  
  
He tried to drown the pain with alcohol that only made his fuck up life worse, by almost getting Mikey killed and Leo captured by an enemy far worse than the Foot.  
  
Every turn, he made mistakes, big and small, and it dawned on him, what good was he for? What was the point anymore?  
  
The darkness was one with him and thoughts of ending things surface and taunted him even as he looked upon the city, as they did so... _‘Jump’_ they told him, ‘ _Why suffer any more?’_ He told them to leave him be, he begged them to leave him be, yet they kept coming, ‘You made him leave! You are the reason he hates you!’  
  
His golden eyes slowly falling towards the end, his foot hesitated, his body stiffened and he could feel his heart pounding in his ears.  
  
_‘Do it!’_  
  
He shuddered holding his fist tight as his body quivered.  
  
_'Do it, Do it, Do it!'_  
  
He sluggishly got up on the edge shifting his one foot towards the edge and witness the city below him and all its glory.  
  
The light like diamonds, the sounds swelled in his head the life and blood of the city thrived before him, and he dared to live in such a world nothing but an empty corpse wandering around the shadows? He didn't belong, he had done the unspeakable and for that he deserved to be erased from this world.  
  
_‘Do it! Do it! Do it!”_  
  
“I’m worthless,” Raph mumbled under his breath, “A good for nothing…”  
  
_‘Yes, you are, yes you are!’_  
  
“I should… end… it…”  
  
Closing his eyes as the rush in his head made him feel like he was floating he raised his arms up and let his body weight tilted forward allowing gravity to take him.  
  
“I’m sorry…. Good... bye Casey…”  
  
“Raph?” A voice came from behind as he shook his head over such distractions, such hallucinations.  
  
Of course, he would hear his voice at this pinnacle moment of his own defeat, his willingness to let go of everything and end it.  
  
He could even feel the presence behind him heavy in question such a trick of the mind, one he will not fall for.  
  
He took another breath, ready himself as suddenly the voice call to him again with heavy sarcasm in it.  
  
“Seriously? Raph stopped trying to be a damn fucken bird you know turtles can’t fly,” Casey mocked letting out a huff of irritation.  
  
It was so real that Raph could smell it off of him as if he was really there.  
  
Was this his mind telling him it was best to drop this idea, come to reason?  
  
Then it hit him like a brick the warm hand on his arm gently pulling him back, it wasn’t his brother's, it wasn’t April’s it was his!

As he stumbled back catching his balance the hand let go of him, allowing him to turn around quickly in shock witnessing it wasn’t an illusion, it really was Casey.

The fear rose to a simmering boil, and he choked on his breath. Why was he back? Did he see what he was about to do?

It wasn't rocket science to catch on, yet Casey seemed oblivious of his actions, as if ignoring the underline fact, not daring to bring it to the light.  
  
Instead, the muscular turtle who he thought he would never see again had his arms crossed and his face was painted clear as day he wasn’t in the mood for shit and wanted to talk.  
  
“Casey… you’re…” Raph forced out of his tightening throat that wanted to close up, making it hard for him to breathe.  
  
“Yeah, and we need to fucken talk Raph!” Casey grumbled, looking him up and down yet not towards the ledge Raph was about to take a skydive from. The posture, the smell indicated it was about what happened to Casey and the past, not the present situation, which Raph figured Casey would address after.  
  
“I… sor…”  
  
“Cut the shit Raph,” Casey warned, “I’m not here to hear you say you're sorry, I’m here for answers.”  
  
“I figured as much…” Raph said to him with a slow nod, “Ask away…”  
  
“But first let me make myself clear. A,” Casey pointed out one finger, “Yeah, I’m pissed at you, I’m angry that you did this to me and what you did was fucken wrong…”  
  
“I know…”  
  
“Shut up Raph and wait, yet B I understand the mating cycle, you lose yourself as I did when you did this to me, so I can’t be fully angry towards you since if I can’t forgive you for what you have done, I can’t forgive what I did to April either…” Casey continued as Raph jerked up his head in a sigh of hope that suddenly shattered when Casey finished, “However, for you to even to have been able to leave the fucken lair, you had to been able to deactivate the cuffs that Donnie made to prevent you from leaving in the first place. I know April had the controller and I know she didn't fucken do it and I really doubt it you were able to do it after it was put on you either... So there is only one explanation... you fucken rigged them before the mating season started, meaning you were in your right mind when you did so!”  
  
Raph head dropped quickly in shame falling silent. Casey glared at him then growled, “So why did you do it if you knew what you might have done?”  
  
“I… I didn’t mean it to happen…” Raph started, then felt a sharp pain in the face as he fell back. His side was throbbing with an unbearable burning sensation, as he looked up witnessing Casey's fist was still in the air showing he was the one that hit him.  
  
“Don’t give me that!”  
  
“I mean it!” Raph yelled back, “Fuck Casey I didn’t think I would have done what I did! I never thought I would lose such control that I would…” Raph shuddered thinking back to his crime, his sin, “Rape you…”  
  
“What the hell do you mean?” Casey questioned crossing his arms red in the face by frustration.  
  
“I mean is, I… I always like you Casey and all the time we are together, I just wanted to tell you… Yet you were with April and I just kept it in… But since that time when Leo wanted to kill you I found out that you like me too, to a point and since then it was more evident,” Raph told him.  
  
“So you're saying this is my fault?”  
  
“No… you see I wanted to tell you and I was too chicken too, so I thought since I have more guts during the mating season I could do it then…”  
  
“Shell Raph you could just have called…” Casey pointed out, “then just risk it.”  
  
“It’s not the same, you know that! Then when you and Ape broke up, I knew I had to do it now, well then. I thought I had more control, believe me, I didn’t know I would do that, if I did, I wouldn’t have done it in the first place Casey,” Raph teared ups showing how sincere he was.  
  
“Fuck, I care about you so much I would never hurt you…”  
  
“But you did,” Casey snorted.  
  
“Yeah… I did… I really fucked it up this time…"  
  
“You sure did,” Casey turned around starting to walk away.  
  
“Casey…”  
  
“Raph, I don't hate you okay. I'm angry at you and I'll be pissed for a while and hate how you treated me instead of doing it the right way… someday I will forgive you when I know you fully regret how you risk my damn life since we both know I could have died… Until then…” Casey narrowed his eyes at him as Raph shifted uneasily, “If I catch you trying to skydive again I'll be the one pounding you six feet under, got it? You will have to live with what you have done regardless, you hear me?”  
  
Raph nodded, feeling the shame.

“Good, now let's get home, please say you have some beer?”  
  
“Huh?” Raph tilted his head up.  
  
“Come on, you know my place was evicted since I haven't paid rent where else am I going to go?” Casey rolled his eyes.  
  
“Oh, right, we moved your stuff to the lair anyways and stored it.”  
  
“Thought so,” Casey nodded, then smirk, “Oh, also you're bunking with Mikey tonight.”  
  
Raph froze with one foot hanging in the air with a horrified look on his face, “Wait, what?!”  
  
With a shrug Casey turned away from him, “I need to sleep somewhere and I don’t want the couch and besides I like your hammock.”  
  
“But... “  
  
“Nope, no buts freak, you owe me remember, this ain't going to fix everything but it’s a start, speaking of starts,” Casey trailed off. Raph stiffened fearing what would come next, not that he would argue to a point understanding he was at Casey’s mercy for now.  
  
“Remember that bet we made?”  
  
“Bet?”  
  
“Yeah, you know the one where I won and you tried to cheat me out of it?” Casey tilted his head at him with a broad smile making Raph take a step back now recalling what the case-man was talking about.  
  
“Ah, shell… really?” Raph choked.  
  
“Yep, I think Master Splinter is going to love his new massage turtle,” Casey barked a laugh, “Come on, let's get going I have to talk to Leo and Master Splinter after.”  
  
“Right,” Raph moaned, he was screwed, but at least, the bright side was Casey was back and he was willing to talk to him, things between them might be different, but there was some light at the end of the tunnel and now he had to make things right.

He will still love Casey and maybe Casey will show the feeling in return someday, until then he needs to build his friendship, picking up the pieces as it was apparent Casey was willing for that to happen by coming back home.

One day things will be right again, he knew it, he had to hope casting the darkness and voices to end it all to fade away as he followed his friend towards the sewers and back home.  
  
_**Fin**_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all like the story, I originally wasn't going to write it until a friend told me I should, since the nature of the story and I'm mostly a horror writer then this kind of writing. Now any fantasy caused by this story is not my fault... enjoy? 
> 
> Thanks for reading :)
> 
> ~Sampsonknight~


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